Saturday, January 31, 2015

Cognitive Development for 3 to 4 year olds - Math (Part 4)

This post will finish up the discussion of the area of learning - Math.  We will finish the component - Geometry and Spatial Sense and do the component - Problem Solving and Analyzing Data.  Remember I am taking my information from the Tennessee Early Learning Developmental Standards (TN-ELDS).

First we will start with the learning expectation:  Begins to explore the size, shape, and spatial arrangement of real objects.  The first performance indicator is:  Notices and copies simple repeating patterns, such as a wall of blocks with long, short, long, short, . . .  Again, we have patterns, and as I have said before, children these days struggle horribly with patterns.  Unless that child is hardwired for math concepts, which only happens to be about the top 20% of children and mostly the wealthy and privileged, they will not simply recognize patterns from their environment.  One of the ugly truths of American education is the fact that two very different realities exist between the haves and the have nots.  It really is not dependent on race but has more to do with wealth and power.  Even though it probably does affect minorities in higher percentages, it also affects white children in rural and poor urban areas.  The haves' educational experience is filled with endless possibilities and resources.  The have nots' educational experience is filled with regulations and crazy fads, etc.  They tend to be the guinea pigs.  However, this experience does not begin when the children start school.  It actually starts from birth.  The wealthy and privileged tend to have better learning experiences at home and in care.  By the time the children start school the gap is so wide that the have nots usually never ever catch up.  The children that usually show up on my doorstep are rural lower middle class or middle class children, and if they are older than toddlers when I get them, they are behind the children I have had since toddlerhood.  Middle and lower class parents by in large just are too busy making a living to provide good experiences for their children in a home setting.  Some stay-at-home moms buck this trend, but others make it worse.   See this trend of the have and have nots has been in existence since at least the 1980s and has gotten slowly more pronounced over time.  The parents that grew up as have nots usually perpetrate the same cycle of not providing good experiences for their children because to them it is normal.  It takes a dedicated individual to break this cycle for his/her children.

The second performance indicator for that learning expectation is:  Begins to notice different shapes and identifies big and small shapes.  I would love to know where they are finding 3 year olds that notice any type of details in today's culture.  It has been my experience that only children that have had adults point out shapes and even the difference between big and small really know what those terms mean.  Again, this will fall in the same group as all the other performance indicators affected by language delay, and language delay seems to be the name of the game these days.  Children have to be exposed to concepts in order for those concepts to have any meaning to them.  Therefore, children with language delays will not notice mathematical details such as shape because they have no foundation for that concept.  I have just started another two year old with massive language delays.  This poor child might as well be a 20 month old and he is approaching 2 and 1/2.  He is pulling up fast with good experiences so we are not dealing with developmental delays just lack of good experiences.  However, when his peers hit kindergarten this language delay problem will cause havoc in the American school systems.

Now we will move on to the component - Problem Solving and Analyzing Data.  The learning expectation for this one is:  Begins to develop foundation for linking concepts and procedures with active experiences.  The first performance indicator is:  Sorts objects and counts and compares the groups formed.  I have a 3 year old that has basically mastered this performance indicator.  I have had her since she was 9 months old.  I have a 4 and 1/2 year old that just mastered this performance indicator in the last 3 to 4 months.  The 3 year old is full-time.  The 4 and 1/2 year old is part-time and attends a PreK program at the local school.  This 4 year old embodies all the downward trends I have been seeing in children the past several years.  The 3 year old is academically ahead of this child, and she will leave him in a trail of dust.  She embodies the haves and unfortunately he is have not.  Her academic experience already so outdoes his even though they both attend my program that she will be light years ahead of him by the time she hits the third grade.  She received the good learning experiences from infancy, and he is playing catch-up hard at the moment.  Children that come through my doors at the age of 2 and 3 will not be ready for this concept until after their fourth birthday.  However, I will say that my insistence during pick-up times that toys be placed in the right containers actually does more for the children's sorting skills than probably any other activity that I do with them.  Even so, counting and comparing still come along slowly for the majority of the children that come in here after the age of 2 years old.  I usually have a year's worth of social/emotional and language foundation to lay before we can even begin to cover such topics in earnest.

The last performance indicator is:  Builds simple structures with blocks.  Most of today's children do not know how to build with basic blocks until an adult shows them how.  Even 4 year olds coming into my center for the first time have to be taught to build with basic blocks.  Sometimes I believe they have never seen plain wood blocks before in their short lives.  Blocks probably represents one of the most important basic toys for all children and a great deal of American homes have no blocks whatsoever.  They may have connecting blocks if they have boys, but plain wooden blocks are becoming obsolete.  My own granddaughters would never get to play with blocks if it were not for the ones at my house.  They do not have any blocks at their house, and they represent the norm.  Toys are becoming more and more electronic, and the children are suffering for it.  Math and Science development start with children exploring and building with basic blocks.  This will come back to bite us hard in the not so distant future if it is not already biting us.  Elementary teachers will have to fill in gaps and let children play with blocks when they should have had those experiences in preschool.  Meeting ever higher standards and expectations in American schools will soon meet a brick wall called immaturity and lack of experiences.

I hope you have enjoyed this post.  Goodbye and God bless!! https://linktr.ee/natawade

Saturday, January 24, 2015

Are Americans Afraid of Their Children?

I recently read a very interesting article by a British nanny that detailed five different reasons American parents struggle with parenting issues.  I will be taking each of her five reasons and delving into them more deeply from an American point of view.  The first of those reasons was that American parents are actually afraid of their children.  Is this really true and if it is, why?

Are Americans really afraid of their own children?
If you were to ask American parents this question point blank, almost all would vehemently deny it.  However, just let that precious little one begin to throw a hissy fit in a public place, and the fear nearly exudes from that parent.  The British nanny accused American parents of not being the adult in the situation, but as an American I understand that the cause of that fear goes so much deeper than just an unwillingness to be the adult even though that is part of the problem.  In this article I am going to delve into the rest of the story.

Problem One:  Perfect Childhood Syndrome
The notion that childhood should be carefree and magical permeates every nook and cranny of American society.  This philosophy is so engrained in our national psyche that most of us do not even realize how much we have been affected by it.  "It's all about the children."  How many times have you heard these words from parents, marketers, early childhood experts, etc.?  We scrimp and sacrifice to give our children everything we believe they deserve especially if we had to do without these things as children.  The problem, however, is that giving children everything usually turns them into spoiled brats.  The "doing without" from our own childhood did more good for us than we will probably ever realize.  Even though childhood should have moments that are carefree and magical, when an entire childhood is carefree and magical children do not grow up to be functioning adults.  They tend to be overgrown children with no idea how to take care of themselves.  The hard lessons of life are just as necessary as the carefree and magical moments.  We, as American parents, have tried with all our might to save our children from the hard lessons of life and have ended up doing so much more harm than those hard lessons ever would have done.  It is so much easier for a two year old to learn that he/she cannot have everything he/she wants than it is for a twenty year old to all at once have to learn that lesson.  However, we are so focused on making sure the two year is happy all the time that we let the lessons necessary for that stage of development slip away only to have to be learned at a different stage of development where is will be exponentially harder for the child to learn.  Our predecessors were not ignorant people with no concept of how to raise children, but looking at our current track record, the same might not be said of us.


Problem Two:  Self-Esteem
A great deal of emphasis has been placed on the importance of self-esteem in the last two or three decades.  This grew out of an era where too much emphasis was placed on putting oneself down.  However, we hit the ditch on the other side of the road very quickly with this concept because we divorced it from the more important concept - self-acceptance.  Whereas the previous era put way too much emphasis on a person's weaknesses, we now put way too much emphasis on feeling good about ourselves.  We now have children especially teenagers and young adults that feel good about themselves apart from any accomplishments or strengths.  If you do not see the problem with that scenario, you have swallowed the self-esteem pill hook, line, and sinker.  A person that does nothing or accomplishes nothing, should not really feel good about themselves.  That is being lazy.  Self-esteem without self-acceptance produces people that can be mean as snakes making life completely miserable for everyone around them and still feel good in their own skin.  What is self-acceptance and how does it differ from self-esteem?  Self-acceptance takes into account a person's strengths and weaknesses.  It is a realistic view of who you are as a person.  Without self-acceptance a person cannot change or strengthen their weak areas because one must know their weaknesses in order to work on them.  Self-esteem when coupled with self-acceptance comes from accomplishment and change.  You feel good about yourself because you have become a better, stronger person through adversity and hard work.  Self-esteem should never be divorced from hard work.  Self-esteem without self-acceptance is only a shallow image of the real thing.  True self-esteem comes from knowing who you are and what you have accomplished.  Therefore, do not be afraid to help children see their weak areas.  It does not destroy real self-esteem to help a child have a realistic view of who they are as a person.  However, do not just point out weaknesses without showing them how to fix it.  Simply pointing out weaknesses was the problem of the previous era.  When you show children the proper way to behave and work, you build them up as people.  It is okay to tell them "no, that is not the way to behave or do that," but it must be coupled with modeling the correct way.

Problem Three:  To Stress or Not To Stress
Several years ago toxic stress became one of the hot button topics of the day.  Media and specialists began to cry against the dangers of toxic stress on children.  I even remember seeing brain scans of children that had endured chronic toxic stress.  What these people failed to point out was the difference between normal stress and toxic stress.  The result was a hysteria about stressing children in the least.  Letting children "cry it out" became akin to child abuse because it might damage the brain.  Making children endure the stress of embarrassment or failure was thought to be unimaginable.  Thus, was born the "everybody gets a trophy" culture.  Fortunately, now psychologists have seen the error of their ways and are trying to make people understand that some stress in necessary for normal development.  However, undoing a hysteria in America takes more than these psychologists ever imagined.  This particular hysteria has found its way into childcare regulations and the accepted practices of educators.  In some states it is against regulations to let a child cry for longer than 5 minutes, and it has long been the practice of many schools to avoid any activity that has "winners and losers."  I will give today's psychologists an "A" for effort.  I have seen many reports on the national media about the need for some stress for proper child development and the detrimental effects of the "everybody gets a trophy" mentality.  However, they are screaming at a fast moving train that left the station years ago.  The damage is done, and it will take years and years to undo all the many facets of where that philosophy embedded itself.  Parents will not feel comfortable allowing their child normal stress especially in a public place until that philosophy has been rooted out at its core.

Problem Four:  Parent Competition
I recently saw a commercial where all the different camps of parenting were about to duke it out on the playground.  Even though the commercial ended on a positive note, the culture it portrayed is very real in America.  Many different camps exist that believe with all of their being that their way of raising children is the "best" way.  I actually blame this one on the "best practice" mentality so prevalent among early childhood theorists and educational circles.  What no one ever explains when dealing with "best practice" whether it be in early childhood circles or parenting circles is that "best practice" wholly depends on the worldview of the people involved.  A person's worldview determines his/her priorities and priorities determine what is or is not best practice.  Among the varying worldviews in existence today the priorities of those worldviews can be complete opposites of one another.  Therefore, what is best practice for one group is at the bottom of the barrel for another group.  Many experts would have you believe that only one best practice exists for every aspect of a child's care, but that really could not be further from the truth.  What is considered "best practice" by most early childhood experts only reflects a liberal Western worldview.  Any other worldview would have a different standard for "best practice."  Herein lies the rub for American parents.  They have all been sold the idea that their worldview and way of doing things is "best practice," and anyone that does not follow their way does not have all the right information.  Our entire culture needs to take a deep breath and realize that different people have different priorities and those different priorities determine "best practice" in their world.  We really need to cut each other some slack.  We are all only fallible human beings and do the best we can most of the time.  There is not one "best practice" for raising children.  Just determine what your priorities are and strive to do your best to follow your own standards.  Leave everyone else alone.

Problem Five:  Liberal Definition of Child Abuse
This brings me to my last point.  With the "best practice" culture has also come the liberalizing of the definition of child abuse.  Now true child abuse is a horrible, despicable crime, but when we start having people being labeled child abusers for letting their child "cry it out" or having the least little scrape, bruise, or mark on them, we have a problem.  Any law professional worth anything will tell you the best way to minimize the effects of a law is to define it too liberally.  The more all-encompassing you try to make a law or regulation the more difficult you make it to enforce.  This is simple, basic common sense.  I come at this one as a former homeschooling mom, and I will tell you that I lived in horror of the idea of having someone turn us into the Department of Human Services just because they disliked the idea of homeschooling.  A great deal of the time the Department of Human Services acts first and asks questions later, and you are very often guilty until proven innocent.  Most people understand that or have witnessed that firsthand.  Therefore, mothers of rowdy boys live with the same constant fear that someone will be petty enough to turn them in for child abuse simply because their boys always have bruises.  As a childcare provider, I have actually had that conversation with a mom because my state makes me a mandatory reporter of child abuse.  I told her that my definition of child abuse is not even remotely that liberal, and that as a mother of a boy I understand about little boys and bruises.  As a former homeschooling mom I would never turn someone in unless I was sure something horrible was happening.  I have heard and witnessed far too many horror  stories of children being taken away from good parents for no other reason than other people's pettiness.  On the other hand, I have seen situations where the children needed to be taken but were kept in the situation because the parents worked the system.  In today's society one cannot rule out the possibility that someone might "report" them simply because they do not agree with their parenting style.  This makes for a very toxic situation, and probably the biggest reason we Americans seem to fear our children.  We are not really afraid of the child as much as we are afraid of what someone will do to us if we actually try to discipline our child in public.

Conclusion
To the British nanny I would say that we are really scared of each other and the intolerance that exists when it comes to parenting practices.  Therefore, we have allowed ourselves to fall hook, line, and sinker for pop parenting styles that are nowhere near good for anyone in the long run.  I hope we will eventually learn our lessons and return to some basic common sense, but in the mean time we are doing the best we can in a culture and environment that fights us every step of the way.

I hope you have enjoyed this post.  Goodbye and God bless!! https://linktr.ee/natawade

Sunday, January 11, 2015

Cognitive Development for 3 to 4 year olds - Math (Part 3)

This post will continue to discussion of the component - Measurement, and then begin the discussion of the component - Geometry and Spatial Sense.  Remember I am taking my information from the Tennessee Early Learning Developmental Standards (TN-ELDS).

The next performance indicator for the component - Measurement and the learning expectation - Begins to demonstrate understanding of time, length, weight, capacity, and temperature is:  Begins to use conventional measurement terms (mile, age span, month, cup, etc) without accuracy.  Again, this math performance indicator relies heavily on language development for its fulfillment.  A child must hear these terms in context to be able to even play with them inaccurately.  American children just do not seem to have the same exposure to these types of terms as their counterparts of a few decades ago unless they are in a program where they receive good exposure.  I cannot stress the importance of using measurement terms in the presence of children.  You need to talk about the day of the week and the month of the year.  When you cook,  talk about the measurements that you use.  Talk, Talk, Talk.  A child's language development hinges on how much that child has heard talking that has as varied a vocabulary as possible.  When a child's language development lags, so does everything else.

The last performance indicator for this learning expectation is:  Understands time as a sequence of events that relates to her daily life.  This particular performance indicator depends very heavily on how structured a child's life is or is not.  When a child's life has a rhythm where the daily events usually flow in a certain order, then that child will quickly develop a sense of the sequence of time.  Nap follows lunch.  Snack follows nap.  These events do not have to happen at exactly the same time every day, but as long as they happen within a 30 minute window of the same time every day, the child's inner clock will set itself to this rhythm.  On the other hand, if a child lives in a free-for-all every day without any sense of structure, that child will not develop a sense of the sequence of time.  I have found children to be happier people when the rhythm is there.  Understanding the flow of time in this way helps soothe them and give them purpose.  Living in chaos usually makes no one happy.  Structure actually helps the development of math concepts because it is a very structured academic discipline.  When a child understands structure, math makes more sense.

Now we will move on to the component - Geometry and Spatial Sense.  The first learning expectation for this one is:  Becomes aware of his body and personal space during active exploration of physical environment.  The first performance indicator is:  Begins to build mental and physical maps of their surroundings.  Unless a child never explores his/her surroundings, this one usually comes along without assistance.  I will say that I have noticed that children today do not have the same sense of the surrounding outside space as I did as a child.  I can remember knowing every single nook and cranny of my yard.  I also could follow the road from my house to the highway, a span of over a mile, in my mind.  My own biological children could maybe tell you every nook and cranny of our yard and property and maybe even the neighborhood, but to follow the road in their mind from our house to town, they could not do.  Children today do not even know their own yards and neighborhoods.  My children played outside more than their peers because we were homeschoolers, but even they lost that sense of the town that I developed as a child.  Children today do not play outside and explore their neighborhoods anymore.  In fact, if parents let their children explore like I explored as a child, those parents would be put in jail.  We have changed what is acceptable in the unhindered exploration of children, and I personally do not think it is a good change.  Yes, it does put the children at risk, but it did when I was a child.  I had more of a sense of my world because I was allowed that risk.  Taking away the risk is sometimes not a good thing.  Something has been lost that is affecting the children's development in certain subjects.  Helicopter parenting and regulations have not made our world better.

The next performance indicator is:  Responds to "Put it beside,' or "Put it under."  Guess what?  This one depends on language development.  When children start with me, I have learned to never assume they know anything.  I have been absolutely flabbergasted at the words and concepts in which children come to me with no understanding.  "Beside" is one of those concepts children regularly come to me without understanding.  "Under" usually has been conquered by the age of three, but I have seen that one, too.  All of these position and direction words have to be used around children for them to develop a sense of what they mean.  When children are handed an electronic device so that the parents do not have to deal with them, those children have a tendency to not hear these concepts as much as those children whose parents regularly converse with them.  Talk to the children, please.

The last performance indicator for this learning expectation is:  Explores geometric shapes using their hands, eyes, and mind.  To demonstrate how little children these days actually do this one, hand a child a puzzle where the shapes of the pieces are marked on the board.  Explain to the child that the outline of each piece is marked on the board, and then let the child try to put the puzzle together.  I will guarantee that 90% of the children will not try to match the shape of the piece to the outline of the puzzle.  The other 10% that will have very strong natural math ability.  Children walking through my door these days have so little experience with puzzles that I usually have to teach puzzles for a year or more to get them to the point where they have basic competence.  This particular performance indicator will have to adult directed well into a child's fourth year unless that child has had great experiences with puzzles as a toddler.

I hope you have enjoyed this post.  Goodbye and God bless!! https://linktr.ee/natawade


Saturday, January 3, 2015

Cognitive Development for 3 to 4 year olds - Math (Part 2)

This post will continue the discussion of cognitive development for 3 to 4 year olds in the domain of math.  We will finish the component - Patterns and Algebra, and then take up the component - Measurement.  Remember I am taking my information from the Tennessee Early Learning Developmental Standards (TN-ELDS).

The second learning expectation for the component - Patterns and Algebra is:  Begins to identify, describe, and extend patterns.  The first performance indicator is:  Begins to recognize, duplicate and create patterns.  This one hits one of my biggest frustrations with childhood experts.  Most of them would have you believe that children will automatically pick up patterns if only you leave them alone with toys long enough.  Really?  This has not been my experience.  Most children have to have patterns demonstrated over and over and over before they begin to understand the concept.  Of course, I picked up patterns easily as a child, but I have a very strong natural aptitude for math.  How many people do you know that do not have a strong natural aptitude for math?  That is the percentage of the population that will not pick up patterns no matter how long you make them stare at toys.  One of the children in my care now has struggled horribly with patterns, and he has had tons of exposure.  It was not until his fifth birthday that patterns started getting easier for him, and he is not developmentally delayed.  He just has no natural aptitude for this type of mathematical concept.  This concept needs to be directly taught and often in order for most children to become proficient.  For some it will take a few months and for others like the boy in my care it might take years.

The second performance indicator for this learning expectation is:  Begins to place objects in order through trial and error.  Honestly, tell me how many children have you seen with the patience to learn to place things in order by trial and error?  Or is the more realistic scenario the following?  The child picks up a stackable toy, tries to figure it out for about two seconds, and then throws it across the room or uses it in another way.  Today's children lack patience.  I have to make my children keep trying with toys of this nature and sometimes have to guide them with gentle clues.  Children forty or fifty years ago might have set with toys and fiddled with them until they figured it out.  Today it better blink and make noise or the children will not know what to do with it.  Our culture has trained today's children for instant results.  Anything that must be accomplished through trial and error will be met with wailing and gnashing of teeth from the children.  Again, you, the adult, will have to oversee this type of activity and make them keep trying.

Now we will move on to the component - Measurement.  The learning expectation for this one is:  Begins to demonstrate understanding of time, length, weight, capacity, and temperature.  The first performance indicator is:  Recognizes and labels measurable characteristics of objects (e.g., "I need the long string.").  Whether a 3 year old will conquer this particular performance indicator very much depends on the level of that child's language development.  All the learning domains overlap one another but language development will almost always precede math development at this age.  If a child lags behind in language development, it causes all the other domains to lag as well.  This is why when children come through my door I will concentrate on language matters until I bring those up to speed.  Also, a 3 year old will never pick up these concepts without a great deal of exposure to these concepts.  I cannot stress how important it is to continually talk about time, weight, capacity, and temperature at every opportunity.  The children must hear those concepts in context to begin to develop an understanding of what they mean.

The last performance indicator we will look at for this post is:  Uses approximate measures of familiar objects using nonconventional measuring tools.  Sometimes it is almost laughable how little childhood "experts" that do not actually work in the field know about how children learn.  Children will not of their own accord start measuring anything.  That concept does not even cross their mind until an adult models it.  Not only that but it takes many exposures for a great deal of children to actually take an interest in measuring.  They will participate when the adult is doing the activity, but for them to experiment on their own takes multiple exposures.  Some children pick the idea up quickly, but when the newness fades so does their interest.  This needs to be something childcare providers and stay-at-home mothers do with their children weekly in order for the concept to grow as it should.  If the adults in a child's life never measure things around the children, measuring will never pull up on the child's radar.

I hope you have enjoyed this post.  Goodbye and God bless!! Check out Natalie's children's books at: https://www.amazon.com/author/nataliewade7457