This post is not going to deal with verbal abuse of children by adults. It is going to look at the very real issue of verbal abuse of adults and other children by children. It is a sad commentary on our society that this even has to be discussed. However, I have been the victim of some of the most vicious verbal blasting at the hand of a four year old.
Before we take off on this subject, I want to clarify a few things. I went to high school in the 1980s and suffered greatly at the hands of my peers as a geek. They were vicious. However, I have been verbally blasted as an adult by children far worse than anything I suffered as a teenager. The difference is the magnitude of the viciousness.
The Level of Viciousness
These days nothing is off limits and children as young as four learn this far too well. When these children reach the teenage years, it turns into cyberbullying. If you have never been the victim of cyberbullying consider yourself extremely lucky, and never cross anyone under the age of 30 to keep it that way. I really do not think until you have experienced firsthand what it is like to have someone post horrible things about you that are twisted half-truths, you cannot fully understand why so many teenagers struggle so hard with it. I understand. I have had the misfortune of crossing a couple of people under the age of 30 and had them take to social media and gossip websites and completely destroy my reputation and good name. You see, once something like that is out in the public arena, it is hard to dispel it no matter how twisted and wrong it is. These people must take lessons from the liberal spin doctors who deal in politics because they take your best points and reform them through outright lies and twisted half-truths to turn your good into something horrible. After all this happened, I truly sympathized with Clarence Thomas. He was once asked how it felt to be made a Supreme Court Justice in spite of the vicious attacks launched against him during his confirmation hearings. Instead of talking about beating his foes and making it to the Supreme Court, he lamented the loss of his good reputation and his good name. He said that he will never be able to get those back to the degree he had them before all the attacks, and he is right. Now imagine suffering something like this just because you made another person angry, and you are beginning to understand the world our children are growing up in today.
The Dirty Laundry Culture
How in the world did we get here? I believe there are two underlying causes for this. Number one, we have a dirty laundry culture. Since the days of Watergate, we have been a culture that flaunts people's dirty laundry. The song by Don Henley could not be a truer representation of our culture if it tried. We jump to the worst conclusion about people in the blink of an eye. No one ever gets the benefit of the doubt anymore. I feel so sorry for people that have to deal with public scandal. It is bad enough that you have your world falling apart around you, but then you have people flaunting your demise for the world to see. Do our children pick up on this? You bet. They learn early to jump to the worst conclusions about people. They learn that words can be a powerful weapon, and we give them plenty of modeling of how to destroy people with words. We model some pretty awful stuff without even thinking about how this is going to come back to bite us one day.
The Ugly Side of Free Expression
The second underlying cause comes from the early childhood experts. Since the late 1980s we have taught children that they can express themselves any way they feel without real consequences. This was started to help children that suffer abuse to feel okay to tell people about what was happening. As with everything else, they took it way too far and now children feel like they should be able to say whatever they want to say without any consequences whatsoever. This goes so far beyond just saying bad words. The worst verbal scalding I ever received from a child did not contain one cuss word, but that child used the technique of twisting half-truths to make me feel like the most useless creature on this planet. When a child looks you straight in the eye and tells you that "you are the worst teacher ever and I am going to tell my mom that you don't do anything all day but sit." For a person that takes great pride in her teaching abilities, but has to sit a lot because of health issues, this is hitting below the belt. Then this child continued to talk about how lazy I was until she had me in tears. Unfortunately I was not the only victim of this particular child. She went after her fellow classmates with the same viciousness. Fortunately one day, her mother caught her in the act and was completely horrified at what her daughter just said to another child. I would love to say that being caught by her mom cured her. It did not. She only became sneakier about her viciousness. I pray that one learns some good life lessons before she hits the teenage years or I will feel sorry for everyone in her path.
Modeling Civility
How do we fix this? To be honest, until we become a more civil society, I do not think we can fix this. We can preach all day long about how wrong it is to bully people, and then undo it all by talking about the latest scandal in front of the children. Our society takes way too much pride in its snarkiness. We are talking out of both sides of our mouth on this issue most of the time. We must treat people, ALL people with civility and respect. This means even the poor soul dealing with a public scandal because he/she said something stupid and the politician that we despise. In our centers we must have an environment of respect for each other, but this does not mean respecting a child's right to say whatever he/she pleases. That is not respect for other people. We must model civility and teach children how to have tact.
The Dirty Little Secret
I brought up this subject because it is the dirty little secret that many people do not discuss. Maybe it is because the adults feel embarrassed to have been so degraded by a child. As adults we should have been able to find a way to prevent the child from verbally abusing us and the other children in our care. Many parents share this same guilt and shame. They feel like failures because they are verbally abused by their children, but really have no real means to stop it without fear of losing their children or going to jail. We do not dare air our own dirty laundry because we have seen others do so to their own demise. We sugarcoat it and pray that by some means our children will learn better and become functioning adults. From my heart, I want to say to those providers and parents that you cannot stop a child from learning your weaknesses and vulnerabilities. Children have been doing that from the dawn of time. What has changed is our society's tolerance for discipline. Many children feel like they have every right to use that knowledge against you as the adult every time it suits their purpose. Even though they may be tearing your heart out, somehow communicate to them that what they are doing is evil and mean to the core. You just might be saving the life of another child that is not as capable as you of dealing with the level of viciousness being thrown your direction. However, do not feel like a failure because a child used this type of manipulative tool against you. It probably means you have a tender heart and they viewed that as a weakness to be exploited.
I hope you have enjoyed this post. Goodbye and God bless!!
Check out Natalie's children's books at: https://www.amazon.com/author/nataliewade7457
Wednesday, April 30, 2014
Saturday, April 26, 2014
The Structured Learning Style
This post will look at the structured learning style. Many would call this the old-fashioned way of teaching that is out of date and out of touch with today's children. However, on a daily basis I prove them wrong. This is my main style of teaching in a manner of speaking. I do put a twist on what you see in public schools, but the content and basic structure are practically the same.
What Is the Structured Learning Style?
Basically, it involves teacher-directed instruction. The instruction follows a predictable routine that varies little from day-to-day. In other words, the daily schedule is set and followed with only slight variations. The instruction follows a line by line format that allows the students to build precept on precept. Many would call this the most boring way to teach. However, for many children this type of system is comforting.
Structured Learning in a Childcare
What does structured learning look like in my childcare? Number one, I have a basic schedule that changes very little even from year to year. With family childcare a provider has the same children for multiple years not just one. When I initiate changes into my schedule, I will always do so gradually making small changes over the course of months until I reach the new goal. I have learned over the years that many small children have a very hard time with change. When they are allowed to settle into a routine, they will take great comfort in that "normalness" and fight all changes to their little world. Making change happen in very small increments helps them to accept the new "normal" over time. This is especially true of children with special needs and even children with ADD and ADHD even though that seems to be a paradox. You would think children with attention issues would hate structure and this type of schedule. However, even though they do hate it in the beginning, once they adjust, they will fight change more than any of the other children. Over the years it has amazed me how much this type of structure calms the most hyper of children. I will admit that some people find implementing this type of structure beyond what they can do. My mother absolutely hates having to implement change in small increments. It drives her nuts. She wants to institute the change and get on with it. I have also had many employees that were of the same mind. However, even my mother has now worked here long enough to understand that I am right, but she still hates it.
One-on-One Instruction
The second aspect of structured learning that I have implemented into my childcare revolves around the one-on-one instruction I provide every child every day. This is where my system deviates from public school classrooms and many other early childhood classrooms. I have a homeschool design to my childcare. Every child has individual planners that lay out his/her lessons in daily incremental steps. I use direct instruction with the children tailoring the delivery of that instruction to each child's personal learning repertoire. For a preschool setting these lessons only take 15-20 minutes per day leaving the child a great portion of the day for free-play. We do have three different group times, but they also only last 10-15 minutes. I believe instruction should be direct but in small daily doses. I agree with the child-centered people that children need much free-play time during the day. I just stay out of their free-play. I do not try to teach during their free-play time. I let them practice what they have learned on their own.
The Mixed-Age Benefit
In my daily schedule I alternate between group activities, free-play, and individual instruction. When I was bigger, I had to have many sessions during the day where I could do the children's one-on-one instruction. Those children that were not doing their one-on-one instruction had free-play at that time. Now that I am much smaller, I can usually finish the one-on-one instruction in one or two sessions in the morning. Even though I do not make them watch each other's school, it is hard to keep them from it. Many days they would rather watch me teach the other children than play. As a homeschooling mom, I understand the value of this. Children learn exponentially more watching an older child's lessons than you would think. They may not fully understand what is going on, but they pick up information you would think way beyond their ability. When they reach that point, they are already familiar with the concept and learn so much faster. This is one of the major benefits to the one-room schoolhouse concept that many homeschoolers employ in their settings. Dividing children by age is actually a relatively new educational concept in the grand scheme of things. For thousands of years, educators mixed ages to allow for this benefit. The younger learn from the older, and the older review watching the younger. It is like getting twice the educational bang for your buck.
One Size Does Not Fit All
As I have alluded to in previous paragraphs, some people would rather not teach if they had to follow such strict structure. Also, as I will cover in my next post, some children need more spontaneity than I provide in my setting. Not everyone has to set up their childcare like mine. Different children need different environments. When will we ever learn that one size will never fit all? Not every child fits in my environment. I tend to attract more conservative parents and parents of special needs children. In the early years, it is very important to find a setting for your child that matches your child's needs. As childcare providers, we need to understand this and not be offended if a child does not fit our setting. Trust me, trying to make a child fit into an environment that is completely opposite of their learning style can be torture for all involved.
Who Benefits from Structure?
What type of child normally fits well into a structured learning environment? I have already talked about children with special needs. This holds for nearly all children on the autism spectrum as well as children with developmental delays. Other children that benefit greatly from this environment are left-brain leaning children. They will thrive in this type of environment. Also, children with emotional issues such as excessive fear or anxiety will find comfort in an environment of this sort. On the other hand, right brain leaning children or children that thrive in a discovery-type environment will more than likely be miserable in a setting like this. The same holds for teachers. I am left-brain leaning and my mother is right-brain leaning. My environment sometimes drives her insane.
I hope you have enjoyed this post. Goodbye and God bless!! Check out Natalie's children's books at: https://www.amazon.com/author/nataliewade7457
What Is the Structured Learning Style?
Basically, it involves teacher-directed instruction. The instruction follows a predictable routine that varies little from day-to-day. In other words, the daily schedule is set and followed with only slight variations. The instruction follows a line by line format that allows the students to build precept on precept. Many would call this the most boring way to teach. However, for many children this type of system is comforting.
Structured Learning in a Childcare
What does structured learning look like in my childcare? Number one, I have a basic schedule that changes very little even from year to year. With family childcare a provider has the same children for multiple years not just one. When I initiate changes into my schedule, I will always do so gradually making small changes over the course of months until I reach the new goal. I have learned over the years that many small children have a very hard time with change. When they are allowed to settle into a routine, they will take great comfort in that "normalness" and fight all changes to their little world. Making change happen in very small increments helps them to accept the new "normal" over time. This is especially true of children with special needs and even children with ADD and ADHD even though that seems to be a paradox. You would think children with attention issues would hate structure and this type of schedule. However, even though they do hate it in the beginning, once they adjust, they will fight change more than any of the other children. Over the years it has amazed me how much this type of structure calms the most hyper of children. I will admit that some people find implementing this type of structure beyond what they can do. My mother absolutely hates having to implement change in small increments. It drives her nuts. She wants to institute the change and get on with it. I have also had many employees that were of the same mind. However, even my mother has now worked here long enough to understand that I am right, but she still hates it.
One-on-One Instruction
The second aspect of structured learning that I have implemented into my childcare revolves around the one-on-one instruction I provide every child every day. This is where my system deviates from public school classrooms and many other early childhood classrooms. I have a homeschool design to my childcare. Every child has individual planners that lay out his/her lessons in daily incremental steps. I use direct instruction with the children tailoring the delivery of that instruction to each child's personal learning repertoire. For a preschool setting these lessons only take 15-20 minutes per day leaving the child a great portion of the day for free-play. We do have three different group times, but they also only last 10-15 minutes. I believe instruction should be direct but in small daily doses. I agree with the child-centered people that children need much free-play time during the day. I just stay out of their free-play. I do not try to teach during their free-play time. I let them practice what they have learned on their own.
The Mixed-Age Benefit
In my daily schedule I alternate between group activities, free-play, and individual instruction. When I was bigger, I had to have many sessions during the day where I could do the children's one-on-one instruction. Those children that were not doing their one-on-one instruction had free-play at that time. Now that I am much smaller, I can usually finish the one-on-one instruction in one or two sessions in the morning. Even though I do not make them watch each other's school, it is hard to keep them from it. Many days they would rather watch me teach the other children than play. As a homeschooling mom, I understand the value of this. Children learn exponentially more watching an older child's lessons than you would think. They may not fully understand what is going on, but they pick up information you would think way beyond their ability. When they reach that point, they are already familiar with the concept and learn so much faster. This is one of the major benefits to the one-room schoolhouse concept that many homeschoolers employ in their settings. Dividing children by age is actually a relatively new educational concept in the grand scheme of things. For thousands of years, educators mixed ages to allow for this benefit. The younger learn from the older, and the older review watching the younger. It is like getting twice the educational bang for your buck.
One Size Does Not Fit All
As I have alluded to in previous paragraphs, some people would rather not teach if they had to follow such strict structure. Also, as I will cover in my next post, some children need more spontaneity than I provide in my setting. Not everyone has to set up their childcare like mine. Different children need different environments. When will we ever learn that one size will never fit all? Not every child fits in my environment. I tend to attract more conservative parents and parents of special needs children. In the early years, it is very important to find a setting for your child that matches your child's needs. As childcare providers, we need to understand this and not be offended if a child does not fit our setting. Trust me, trying to make a child fit into an environment that is completely opposite of their learning style can be torture for all involved.
Who Benefits from Structure?
What type of child normally fits well into a structured learning environment? I have already talked about children with special needs. This holds for nearly all children on the autism spectrum as well as children with developmental delays. Other children that benefit greatly from this environment are left-brain leaning children. They will thrive in this type of environment. Also, children with emotional issues such as excessive fear or anxiety will find comfort in an environment of this sort. On the other hand, right brain leaning children or children that thrive in a discovery-type environment will more than likely be miserable in a setting like this. The same holds for teachers. I am left-brain leaning and my mother is right-brain leaning. My environment sometimes drives her insane.
I hope you have enjoyed this post. Goodbye and God bless!! Check out Natalie's children's books at: https://www.amazon.com/author/nataliewade7457
Wednesday, April 23, 2014
Dealing with Mouth Issues - Bad Language
This post will deal with the ever increasing problem of foul language use by preschoolers. I have heard from many a preschooler teacher that they have been called things in recent years by preschoolers that they had to Google because they had never heard that word. The use of foul language by preschoolers can be caused by many factors. We are going to look at most of these factors.
The Innocent Use of Bad Language
Before we delve into the myriad of reasons preschool children pick up bad language in our culture, I want to talk about innocent use of bad language. This happens, and sometimes because other children can cuss a blue streak we overreact to a child that simply said a word incorrectly. I actually have a perfect example for this. When my oldest was in kindergarten, she had a hard time differentiating between "d," "b," and "p." At that time I taught piano lessons as well as homeschooled my children. I had one particular student that often had to stay after her lesson for quite a while before her mother could pick her up. Often, I would let her help me with my oldest daughter's lessons. On this particular day we were doing her reading lesson and the word was "ditch." She mixed the "d" with a "b," and I thought my piano student's eyes were going to jump out of her head. I, however, did not even react. I just told her to look at the word again, and she corrected herself. I knew my daughter had no idea what that word even meant even though my piano student sure did. That is how that situation should have been handled - no reaction. However, I have seen adults go off on a child because they accidentally said something like this. Adults, you can tell the difference between an accident and when a child says something on purpose. If something must be said, just tell the child that is not a nice word, and we should not use it.
Number One Culprit - Parents
Now we come to the many, many reasons preschool children pick up the use of bad language. I hate to say this but the number one culprit is parents. Many young adults and young parents use cuss words every other breath these days. If you have ever stood behind them in line at the store, you will more than likely hear 20 to 30 cuss words in a period of about 5 minutes. Crude language is the norm for this age group, and they very often do not even think about how their habits affect the people around them. You can always tell when parents are to blame because it comes out in the child's dramatic play. The child will be pretending to be on the phone cussing a blue streak. In this case, the child is simply modeling what they hear at home. This is another situation where you should not overreact. This type of language is normal to this child, which is awful but the truth. You will have to be proactive in teaching children which words should not be used at childcare. However, unless all of your parents cuss consistently, you will have to deal with it on a case by case basis, or you will inadvertently end up teaching some children bad words they did not already know.
Second Biggest Culprit - TV and Radio
Even when the parents do not use crude language on a consistent basis, a child has a thousand other places in this culture to pick up crude language. The second biggest culprit is television and radio. Some of the pop songs these days are horrible. The language in them would have been considered X-rated when I was growing up. Some television programs are just as bad. Again, the television and radio programming geared for young adults contains a great deal of crude language. Many parents watch and listen to this programming without even thinking about how it will affect their children. This type of bad language use will also come out in a child's play. They will say a phrase from a song or television program during play that is completely inappropriate. Again, do not overreact. This is a teachable moment not a time for a spasm. You need to just simply explain that we do not say those things or sing those type of things at childcare.
Next Culprit - Peers
In today's culture unless you homeschool and greatly screen your child's playmates, it is nearly impossible to keep your child from being exposed to crude language. They will hear it at preschool despite their teacher's best efforts. When they hear it, they will experiment with it just like they experiment with other vocabulary. The key is to teach the children about inappropriate language. Maybe, just maybe, when this next generation grows up they will learn to be a little more civil than the generation ahead of them.
When They Cross the Line
Most of the time, a low-key reaction should be used when children use inappropriate language. However, there is one situation that is very different. By the time some children are four years old, they have learned that bad language can be used as an emotional weapon. This is where it crosses the line from being an innocent slip-up to a deliberate act of aggression. When a child uses foul language to berate an adult or another child, that child has crossed the line. That situation should be handled the same as any other act of aggression. Bullying starts in preschool these days, and many times the victims are the teachers. Do not let a child learn to use foul language as a weapon. We have far too much of that. Let that child know that when he/she chooses to use foul language in that manner, the consequences are never going to be in his/her favor. The ugly truth that no one wants to really talk about these days is that this is probably one of the largest reasons children are removed from preschools. I personally will not let a child cuss me out without giving that parent a stern warning that if it happens again, I will remove their child from my childcare. No teachers, preschool through high school, should have to stand there and allow a child to berate and cuss them. We do not get paid enough for that.
I hope you have enjoyed this post. Goodbye and God bless!! Check out Natalie's children's books at: https://www.amazon.com/author/nataliewade7457
The Innocent Use of Bad Language
Before we delve into the myriad of reasons preschool children pick up bad language in our culture, I want to talk about innocent use of bad language. This happens, and sometimes because other children can cuss a blue streak we overreact to a child that simply said a word incorrectly. I actually have a perfect example for this. When my oldest was in kindergarten, she had a hard time differentiating between "d," "b," and "p." At that time I taught piano lessons as well as homeschooled my children. I had one particular student that often had to stay after her lesson for quite a while before her mother could pick her up. Often, I would let her help me with my oldest daughter's lessons. On this particular day we were doing her reading lesson and the word was "ditch." She mixed the "d" with a "b," and I thought my piano student's eyes were going to jump out of her head. I, however, did not even react. I just told her to look at the word again, and she corrected herself. I knew my daughter had no idea what that word even meant even though my piano student sure did. That is how that situation should have been handled - no reaction. However, I have seen adults go off on a child because they accidentally said something like this. Adults, you can tell the difference between an accident and when a child says something on purpose. If something must be said, just tell the child that is not a nice word, and we should not use it.
Number One Culprit - Parents
Now we come to the many, many reasons preschool children pick up the use of bad language. I hate to say this but the number one culprit is parents. Many young adults and young parents use cuss words every other breath these days. If you have ever stood behind them in line at the store, you will more than likely hear 20 to 30 cuss words in a period of about 5 minutes. Crude language is the norm for this age group, and they very often do not even think about how their habits affect the people around them. You can always tell when parents are to blame because it comes out in the child's dramatic play. The child will be pretending to be on the phone cussing a blue streak. In this case, the child is simply modeling what they hear at home. This is another situation where you should not overreact. This type of language is normal to this child, which is awful but the truth. You will have to be proactive in teaching children which words should not be used at childcare. However, unless all of your parents cuss consistently, you will have to deal with it on a case by case basis, or you will inadvertently end up teaching some children bad words they did not already know.
Second Biggest Culprit - TV and Radio
Even when the parents do not use crude language on a consistent basis, a child has a thousand other places in this culture to pick up crude language. The second biggest culprit is television and radio. Some of the pop songs these days are horrible. The language in them would have been considered X-rated when I was growing up. Some television programs are just as bad. Again, the television and radio programming geared for young adults contains a great deal of crude language. Many parents watch and listen to this programming without even thinking about how it will affect their children. This type of bad language use will also come out in a child's play. They will say a phrase from a song or television program during play that is completely inappropriate. Again, do not overreact. This is a teachable moment not a time for a spasm. You need to just simply explain that we do not say those things or sing those type of things at childcare.
Next Culprit - Peers
In today's culture unless you homeschool and greatly screen your child's playmates, it is nearly impossible to keep your child from being exposed to crude language. They will hear it at preschool despite their teacher's best efforts. When they hear it, they will experiment with it just like they experiment with other vocabulary. The key is to teach the children about inappropriate language. Maybe, just maybe, when this next generation grows up they will learn to be a little more civil than the generation ahead of them.
When They Cross the Line
Most of the time, a low-key reaction should be used when children use inappropriate language. However, there is one situation that is very different. By the time some children are four years old, they have learned that bad language can be used as an emotional weapon. This is where it crosses the line from being an innocent slip-up to a deliberate act of aggression. When a child uses foul language to berate an adult or another child, that child has crossed the line. That situation should be handled the same as any other act of aggression. Bullying starts in preschool these days, and many times the victims are the teachers. Do not let a child learn to use foul language as a weapon. We have far too much of that. Let that child know that when he/she chooses to use foul language in that manner, the consequences are never going to be in his/her favor. The ugly truth that no one wants to really talk about these days is that this is probably one of the largest reasons children are removed from preschools. I personally will not let a child cuss me out without giving that parent a stern warning that if it happens again, I will remove their child from my childcare. No teachers, preschool through high school, should have to stand there and allow a child to berate and cuss them. We do not get paid enough for that.
I hope you have enjoyed this post. Goodbye and God bless!! Check out Natalie's children's books at: https://www.amazon.com/author/nataliewade7457
Saturday, April 19, 2014
The Active Learning Style
This post will deal with those people that must be actively engaged to learn. These are the children that have a very difficult time sitting still and concentrating. They must be physically engaged in order to properly process information. This is often referred to as kinetic learning.
Personal Learning Repertiores
It has been a while in these posts of learning styles since I referred to personal learning repertoires. For this style I want to refresh everyone's memory on this concept because sometimes people have varying learning styles according to subject. Some people can learn through both inactive and active learning styles regardless of the subject matter. These people are close enough to the middle of the learning curve to be able to process information in even their less dominant style. Sometimes, however, a person that in most subject matters falls in the middle of the learning curve will fall in the extremes on one particular subject matter.
The Extreme
Often it is a matter of personal preference and what captures the attention of that person as to when a person kicks into an extreme. I had a friend that in most everything never had a problem learning math related material until she hit statistics. For some reason statistics did not make sense to her at all. I had to tutor her to help her pass that class and had to walk her through each process step by step. Normally, this friend leans kinetic but barely, but in statistics she was slammed into the inactive style very much to the extreme. She had to have a completely quiet and chaos-free environment for statistics, which was not normal for her. Up until this subject, she had been able to study in just about any environment. This can happen for any student when he/she hits subject matter completely out of his/her comfort zone.
Learning By Doing
What exactly entails the active learning style? Another name for this learning style might be the doing learning style or learning by doing. It involves action and getting the whole body involved. Many times a child that has attention problems or wiggle issues may benefit from lessons designed to utilize the entire body. However, do not automatically assume that all small children learn this way. Sometimes children with attention deficit issues actually do not learn this way. They like activities designed in this manner, but they cannot retain information in a chaotic environment. In short, they have tons of fun but learn absolutely nothing.
The Overload Paradox
I actually ran across this paradox with the first child in my care on the autism spectrum. This child challenged me more than I have ever been challenged in my life. My training had taught me that attention issues should be addressed with kinetic learning. When I used kinetic learning with this child, she became overstimulated faster than I had ever seen. Once she hit overload, it was nearly impossible to rein her back. Since that time I have watched for children that were easily overstimulated and avoided kinetic activities with them. These children actually need calm, quiet environments to learn. They cannot handle noisy, chaotic environments.
Trial and Error
When should you use the active learning style? As with all the different learning styles and the different individuals that we teach, this comes down to trial and error. Always try to have activities from various learning styles especially at the start of a new year. Observe the children. Which style seems to suit each child? Do you have children that are easily overstimulated? Also, remember that there can be a huge difference between a fun activity and an activity that accomplishes the teaching goals you have for your students. Many times kinetic activities are better suited for subject matters that call for discovery and exploration. Teaching the names of the colors may get lost in the shuffle of a loud and rowdy game, but there will be some students that thrive in a loud and rowdy environment. You must look at the children in your care and determine which style is the most appropriate for each subject matter. Always try presenting material in different ways to see what produces the best results for your children.
Easily Overstimulated
In my childcare at the moment, 3/4 of my children are easily overstimulated. I have to be very careful of loud and rowdy even outside sometimes. One of my children cannot control himself once he starts down the path to overstimulation. He is very much like the first child I had on the autism spectrum, and we know this child has developmental issues. The doctors just cannot seem to figure out exactly where his issues are at the moment. He learns when everything is calm. He becomes an out of control person when his environment is not calm.
The Wigglers
On the other hand, I have one child that is a bad wiggler. She reminds me of my middle biological child. My child could learn standing on her head, twirling around, etc. She absorbed all the information around her even though she was hardly ever still. One of my favorite funny memories of homeschooling her involved doing her math flash cards. She would be in the chair across from me in every position possible but still be answering every single flashcard correctly. Often she changed positions for every single flashcard, but I learned to just deal with it because she was learning. Now she is in graduate school, and she still likes to study in a nonconventional way. It suits her, and it works for her. However, even she has run across classes that require her to find a calm, quiet environment in which to work because she is so far outside her comfort zone.
Be Flexible
What is the key to all this? Always be flexible. Every batch of kids has a different collective personality. Keep your eyes out for the wigglers that can process information even when every inch of them is moving. Also, keep your eyes out for the easily overstimulated. Plan active learning activities for your wigglers, but not for your easily overstimulated. It is a dance that we renew every year with every new batch of children.
I hope you have enjoyed this post. Goodbye and God bless!! Check out Natalie's children's books at: https://www.amazon.com/author/nataliewade7457
Personal Learning Repertiores
It has been a while in these posts of learning styles since I referred to personal learning repertoires. For this style I want to refresh everyone's memory on this concept because sometimes people have varying learning styles according to subject. Some people can learn through both inactive and active learning styles regardless of the subject matter. These people are close enough to the middle of the learning curve to be able to process information in even their less dominant style. Sometimes, however, a person that in most subject matters falls in the middle of the learning curve will fall in the extremes on one particular subject matter.
The Extreme
Often it is a matter of personal preference and what captures the attention of that person as to when a person kicks into an extreme. I had a friend that in most everything never had a problem learning math related material until she hit statistics. For some reason statistics did not make sense to her at all. I had to tutor her to help her pass that class and had to walk her through each process step by step. Normally, this friend leans kinetic but barely, but in statistics she was slammed into the inactive style very much to the extreme. She had to have a completely quiet and chaos-free environment for statistics, which was not normal for her. Up until this subject, she had been able to study in just about any environment. This can happen for any student when he/she hits subject matter completely out of his/her comfort zone.
Learning By Doing
What exactly entails the active learning style? Another name for this learning style might be the doing learning style or learning by doing. It involves action and getting the whole body involved. Many times a child that has attention problems or wiggle issues may benefit from lessons designed to utilize the entire body. However, do not automatically assume that all small children learn this way. Sometimes children with attention deficit issues actually do not learn this way. They like activities designed in this manner, but they cannot retain information in a chaotic environment. In short, they have tons of fun but learn absolutely nothing.
The Overload Paradox
I actually ran across this paradox with the first child in my care on the autism spectrum. This child challenged me more than I have ever been challenged in my life. My training had taught me that attention issues should be addressed with kinetic learning. When I used kinetic learning with this child, she became overstimulated faster than I had ever seen. Once she hit overload, it was nearly impossible to rein her back. Since that time I have watched for children that were easily overstimulated and avoided kinetic activities with them. These children actually need calm, quiet environments to learn. They cannot handle noisy, chaotic environments.
Trial and Error
When should you use the active learning style? As with all the different learning styles and the different individuals that we teach, this comes down to trial and error. Always try to have activities from various learning styles especially at the start of a new year. Observe the children. Which style seems to suit each child? Do you have children that are easily overstimulated? Also, remember that there can be a huge difference between a fun activity and an activity that accomplishes the teaching goals you have for your students. Many times kinetic activities are better suited for subject matters that call for discovery and exploration. Teaching the names of the colors may get lost in the shuffle of a loud and rowdy game, but there will be some students that thrive in a loud and rowdy environment. You must look at the children in your care and determine which style is the most appropriate for each subject matter. Always try presenting material in different ways to see what produces the best results for your children.
Easily Overstimulated
In my childcare at the moment, 3/4 of my children are easily overstimulated. I have to be very careful of loud and rowdy even outside sometimes. One of my children cannot control himself once he starts down the path to overstimulation. He is very much like the first child I had on the autism spectrum, and we know this child has developmental issues. The doctors just cannot seem to figure out exactly where his issues are at the moment. He learns when everything is calm. He becomes an out of control person when his environment is not calm.
The Wigglers
On the other hand, I have one child that is a bad wiggler. She reminds me of my middle biological child. My child could learn standing on her head, twirling around, etc. She absorbed all the information around her even though she was hardly ever still. One of my favorite funny memories of homeschooling her involved doing her math flash cards. She would be in the chair across from me in every position possible but still be answering every single flashcard correctly. Often she changed positions for every single flashcard, but I learned to just deal with it because she was learning. Now she is in graduate school, and she still likes to study in a nonconventional way. It suits her, and it works for her. However, even she has run across classes that require her to find a calm, quiet environment in which to work because she is so far outside her comfort zone.
Be Flexible
What is the key to all this? Always be flexible. Every batch of kids has a different collective personality. Keep your eyes out for the wigglers that can process information even when every inch of them is moving. Also, keep your eyes out for the easily overstimulated. Plan active learning activities for your wigglers, but not for your easily overstimulated. It is a dance that we renew every year with every new batch of children.
I hope you have enjoyed this post. Goodbye and God bless!! Check out Natalie's children's books at: https://www.amazon.com/author/nataliewade7457
Wednesday, April 16, 2014
Dealing with Mouth Issues - Sassiness
This post will start a 3-part series on issues of the mouth. I will start the discussion with sassiness. With the decline of respect for adults that we are seeing in recent decades, this has become more and more of an issue than in past generations. To be honest, if I had said half the things that children say to me and their parents these days, I would have been minus a head. It just was not tolerated, and there lies the point where we start this discussion.
Expectations
Believe it or not, your expectations play a major role in how children behave. Past generations did not tolerate sassiness. It was treated like a major offense. Now sassiness in toddlers and two year olds is thought to be cute. I have seen many a young mother or child care provider have arguments with a sassy toddler or two year old, and then immediately talk about how darling the child is. However, let that same child gain a year or two and the sassiness ceases to be cute, and those parents/caregivers desperately seek help for their out of control preschooler. In those moments, I just shake my head and tell them they created the monster, and now they are going to have to deal with it. They taught that child to think that sassiness is a positive way to gain attention, which was not a wise move at all. Slaying the monster may get ugly.
The Cost of Tolerating Sassiness
This has been one of the biggest contentions I have had with young employees. I have actually been told that arguing with the toddlers and twos was their favorite part of the job. I would try to explain to them that they are setting a precedent that will come back to bite them in the near future, but I have had little success with getting my point across until their precious darlings turn into the mouthy monsters I knew they would. Then they come to me begging me to fix it. It is then that I have to explain to them that undoing what they have done will not be easy. It will require that they change their expectations and be consistent about it. Most of the time, these young employees then start complaining about how the job is not fun anymore. They feel like they have to be the bad guy all the time and cannot stand that they have to stay on top of it all the time. However, almost in the same breath, they will talk about how they have lost complete control of the children. Tolerating sassiness has a huge cost.
A Figment of My Imagination?
This is a subject that is completely skirted in early childhood classes. When I was taking early childhood classes while getting my degree, it seemed to me that the early childhood experts believed that sassiness was a figment of my imagination. They told us that if we treated the children with respect and gave them choices, sassiness would just melt away. What planet do these people live on? How this has played out in the real world looks much different. Childcare providers end up having to put up with being called everything under the sun with a smile on their face while they try to get the sweet little fire-breathing toddler or two year old to choose between the two positive choices we have given them. Sassiness does not melt away, and we end up with 3, 4, and 5 year olds having screaming, sometimes cussing hissy fits because they cannot have what they want. We need a very different strategy if we want a different result.
Sassiness = Negative Consequences
What I am about to propose will make some early childhood experts cringe, maybe even cuss and throw things, but I am afraid we need to take some lessons from past generations. Number one, treat sassiness the same as you would treat violent behavior. If a child is punching another child in the face, we will deal with that strongly and swiftly. We need to do the same for sassiness. When a child, even a toddler sasses, they need to understand strongly and swiftly that sassiness is completely inappropriate. I give them my stern look and tell them that they will not speak to me like that. If they persist, I will place them in an area where they can cool down. However you handle it, the key is to not let the behavior gain the child anything positive at all. Let sassiness reap negative consequences if you want sassiness to melt away. This has to start as soon as the sassing starts or the situation will escalate to the point that dealing with it will be most difficult.
The Enabled/Enabler Situation
What do you do if you have allowed sassing and now you have a mouthy monster? Number one, you are going to have to steel yourself for the fight of the century. If the child has been allowed to be sassy up to this point, that child will think it is his/her right and privilege to continue to be sassy for the rest of his/her life. It will not be fun. You will have to handle it strongly and swiftly for probably months, which will make you feel like the bad guy. However, keep in mind that you created the monster and backing down is not an option unless you want to be completely dominated and bullied by the child for the rest of your life. In psychology circles this is called the enabled/enabler situation. You have enabled the child to be sassy and when you stop enabling the child, the enabled will go ballistic. This holds true whether the person is two years old or ninety years old. One of the hardest situations a person will face in life is ceasing to be an enabler. However, do it when they are two rather than when they are older because the longer the enabling continues the harder it is to break the cycle. Enabling is one of the most unhealthy emotional situations in which a person can find themselves. Do not think that tolerating sassiness will not harm anyone. It harms the enabled, the enabler, and any innocents that happen to get caught in the crossfire.
A Change of Attitude
As a society we must change our attitude about sassiness. It is not a phase they will outgrow on their own. It is not a developmentally appropriate behavior that makes for well-adjusted adults. It is like a gateway drug. Sassiness leads to other and more negative behaviors. All the other mouth issues I will discuss have their beginnings in tolerated sassiness. Previous generations understood this, but we are smarter than previous generations or so we think. I guess that makes us a teenage society. We think we know it all when we really do not know much at all.
I hope you have enjoyed this post. Goodbye and God bless!! Check out Natalie's children's books at: https://www.amazon.com/author/nataliewade7457
Expectations
Believe it or not, your expectations play a major role in how children behave. Past generations did not tolerate sassiness. It was treated like a major offense. Now sassiness in toddlers and two year olds is thought to be cute. I have seen many a young mother or child care provider have arguments with a sassy toddler or two year old, and then immediately talk about how darling the child is. However, let that same child gain a year or two and the sassiness ceases to be cute, and those parents/caregivers desperately seek help for their out of control preschooler. In those moments, I just shake my head and tell them they created the monster, and now they are going to have to deal with it. They taught that child to think that sassiness is a positive way to gain attention, which was not a wise move at all. Slaying the monster may get ugly.
The Cost of Tolerating Sassiness
This has been one of the biggest contentions I have had with young employees. I have actually been told that arguing with the toddlers and twos was their favorite part of the job. I would try to explain to them that they are setting a precedent that will come back to bite them in the near future, but I have had little success with getting my point across until their precious darlings turn into the mouthy monsters I knew they would. Then they come to me begging me to fix it. It is then that I have to explain to them that undoing what they have done will not be easy. It will require that they change their expectations and be consistent about it. Most of the time, these young employees then start complaining about how the job is not fun anymore. They feel like they have to be the bad guy all the time and cannot stand that they have to stay on top of it all the time. However, almost in the same breath, they will talk about how they have lost complete control of the children. Tolerating sassiness has a huge cost.
A Figment of My Imagination?
This is a subject that is completely skirted in early childhood classes. When I was taking early childhood classes while getting my degree, it seemed to me that the early childhood experts believed that sassiness was a figment of my imagination. They told us that if we treated the children with respect and gave them choices, sassiness would just melt away. What planet do these people live on? How this has played out in the real world looks much different. Childcare providers end up having to put up with being called everything under the sun with a smile on their face while they try to get the sweet little fire-breathing toddler or two year old to choose between the two positive choices we have given them. Sassiness does not melt away, and we end up with 3, 4, and 5 year olds having screaming, sometimes cussing hissy fits because they cannot have what they want. We need a very different strategy if we want a different result.
Sassiness = Negative Consequences
What I am about to propose will make some early childhood experts cringe, maybe even cuss and throw things, but I am afraid we need to take some lessons from past generations. Number one, treat sassiness the same as you would treat violent behavior. If a child is punching another child in the face, we will deal with that strongly and swiftly. We need to do the same for sassiness. When a child, even a toddler sasses, they need to understand strongly and swiftly that sassiness is completely inappropriate. I give them my stern look and tell them that they will not speak to me like that. If they persist, I will place them in an area where they can cool down. However you handle it, the key is to not let the behavior gain the child anything positive at all. Let sassiness reap negative consequences if you want sassiness to melt away. This has to start as soon as the sassing starts or the situation will escalate to the point that dealing with it will be most difficult.
The Enabled/Enabler Situation
What do you do if you have allowed sassing and now you have a mouthy monster? Number one, you are going to have to steel yourself for the fight of the century. If the child has been allowed to be sassy up to this point, that child will think it is his/her right and privilege to continue to be sassy for the rest of his/her life. It will not be fun. You will have to handle it strongly and swiftly for probably months, which will make you feel like the bad guy. However, keep in mind that you created the monster and backing down is not an option unless you want to be completely dominated and bullied by the child for the rest of your life. In psychology circles this is called the enabled/enabler situation. You have enabled the child to be sassy and when you stop enabling the child, the enabled will go ballistic. This holds true whether the person is two years old or ninety years old. One of the hardest situations a person will face in life is ceasing to be an enabler. However, do it when they are two rather than when they are older because the longer the enabling continues the harder it is to break the cycle. Enabling is one of the most unhealthy emotional situations in which a person can find themselves. Do not think that tolerating sassiness will not harm anyone. It harms the enabled, the enabler, and any innocents that happen to get caught in the crossfire.
A Change of Attitude
As a society we must change our attitude about sassiness. It is not a phase they will outgrow on their own. It is not a developmentally appropriate behavior that makes for well-adjusted adults. It is like a gateway drug. Sassiness leads to other and more negative behaviors. All the other mouth issues I will discuss have their beginnings in tolerated sassiness. Previous generations understood this, but we are smarter than previous generations or so we think. I guess that makes us a teenage society. We think we know it all when we really do not know much at all.
I hope you have enjoyed this post. Goodbye and God bless!! Check out Natalie's children's books at: https://www.amazon.com/author/nataliewade7457
Saturday, April 12, 2014
The Low-Tech Learning Style
This post will look at the low-tech learning style and how to implement it in our high-tech world. Technology has done wonders for our society, but has it really made us smarter as a people? Many people swear that technology has made us lazy as a society, and we have lost some wisdom and knowledge that we possessed before the advent of all this technology. In the educational world, I have to agree. Technology has made us mentally lazy, but even in today's society, it does not have to be this way.
What is Low-Tech Learning?
What do I mean by low-tech learning? Low-tech learning is learning that does not utilize machines to accomplish its purpose. Even calculators are considered technological assistance even though most people in the United States would be absolutely lost without one. I, too, rely on calculators to tally up large and complicated sums even though I do try to keep my mental math skills sharp. As a homeschooling mom, I was one of those teachers that did not allow calculators until you hit trigonometry that required a scientific calculator. I expected my children to be able to calculate on paper and mentally even complicated mathematical equations. How did these expectations serve my children? They all survived advanced math courses in high school and college without any problems. My youngest two went to public high school and took honors and advanced placement courses in high school. I did not tolerate mental laziness, and it served all of them very well.
Back to Nature
My last post was on high-tech learning, and I admitted that my preschool experience did involve educational television. However, my childhood was also filled with playing outside quite a bit. Much is being made these days of getting children back to nature. Many studies have been conducted touting the virtues of playing in the outdoors. This has a great deal to do with low-tech learning. Much science can and should be learned by children engaging with the natural world. The foundations for many mathematical concepts are also laid by children learning to manipulate materials. They learn about angles and develop a sense of numeration this way as well. Playing outdoors also builds children's ability to understand their own limitations. These basic survival skills have been lost in the present generations, and this is effecting math and science abilities. They simply have no natural point of reference for certain concepts. Therefore, they hit school behind previous generations in basic knowledge. As a homeschooling mom, my children played outside as much as I did. I must have missed the memo on helicopter parenting that became so prevalent in the parents of my children's peers. Actually, I burned that memo and decided to thwart the philosophies of an entire generation on purpose. I knew even as a young mom that the long-term consequences of the helicopter parenting philosophy would end in utter and complete disaster. However, as a childcare provider regulations forced me to be a helicopter provider. That is, until I decided to declare my independence and drop below licensing requirements. I guess I am still a homeschooler at heart.
Open-Ended Toys
While the skills and experiences gained through outside play are invaluable, that serves as only half of the equation of low-tech learning. The rest is in old-fashioned ways of teaching. On this front I agree with about half of what most early childhood experts push in this particular concept. They advocate making sure that the environment of young children contains many basic, open-ended toys such as blocks, empty containers, etc. Open-ended toys do provide the opportunity for children to use their imagination more. However, even though they advocate open-ended toys, they would have declared my toys as a child to be hazards. People, you just cannot have it both ways. Sticks and rocks and broken toys made up 3/4 of my childhood. Perfectly safe environments remove a lot of opportunity for children to learn about risk and the brokenness that makes up the world we live in.
The Value of Direct Instruction
The point where I diverge from the early childhood experts comes down to the actual teaching. I believe 1000% in direct instruction for most concepts. I despise child-centered curriculums with a passion because I have witnessed the horrendous results of such curriculums when used in their purest forms in the homeschooling world. Children need to be taught not led. If you have to rely on leading a child, you open up both you and the child to be subject to the foolish whims of childhood. There is a reason God put the verse, "Foolishness is bound up in the heart of a child. Only discipline will remove it far from him,"in the Bible. We have so idealized childhood that we no longer understand that some things in childhood should not carry over to the adult world. Early childhood experts do not even acknowledge that children have foolishness coming out their ears at times. All they talk about is reclaiming the magic of childhood and always holding onto the sense of wonder. In the real world, a child's sense of wonder comes with a great deal of unrealistic expectations and flat-out ignorance. Acquiring wisdom requires that we "put away childish things."
In summary, low-tech learning requires that children have many, many, many opportunities to handle natural materials and open-ended toys. Free-play must constitute a great deal of a child's day. When teaching is done, it must be precise and to the point directly instructing a child in the concepts that are necessary in today's world. Technology needs to be a compliment and not the main source of any instruction. For very young children technology is not even necessary, in my opinion.
I hope you have enjoyed this post. Goodbye and God bless!! Check out Natalie's children's books at: https://www.amazon.com/author/nataliewade7457
What is Low-Tech Learning?
What do I mean by low-tech learning? Low-tech learning is learning that does not utilize machines to accomplish its purpose. Even calculators are considered technological assistance even though most people in the United States would be absolutely lost without one. I, too, rely on calculators to tally up large and complicated sums even though I do try to keep my mental math skills sharp. As a homeschooling mom, I was one of those teachers that did not allow calculators until you hit trigonometry that required a scientific calculator. I expected my children to be able to calculate on paper and mentally even complicated mathematical equations. How did these expectations serve my children? They all survived advanced math courses in high school and college without any problems. My youngest two went to public high school and took honors and advanced placement courses in high school. I did not tolerate mental laziness, and it served all of them very well.
Back to Nature
My last post was on high-tech learning, and I admitted that my preschool experience did involve educational television. However, my childhood was also filled with playing outside quite a bit. Much is being made these days of getting children back to nature. Many studies have been conducted touting the virtues of playing in the outdoors. This has a great deal to do with low-tech learning. Much science can and should be learned by children engaging with the natural world. The foundations for many mathematical concepts are also laid by children learning to manipulate materials. They learn about angles and develop a sense of numeration this way as well. Playing outdoors also builds children's ability to understand their own limitations. These basic survival skills have been lost in the present generations, and this is effecting math and science abilities. They simply have no natural point of reference for certain concepts. Therefore, they hit school behind previous generations in basic knowledge. As a homeschooling mom, my children played outside as much as I did. I must have missed the memo on helicopter parenting that became so prevalent in the parents of my children's peers. Actually, I burned that memo and decided to thwart the philosophies of an entire generation on purpose. I knew even as a young mom that the long-term consequences of the helicopter parenting philosophy would end in utter and complete disaster. However, as a childcare provider regulations forced me to be a helicopter provider. That is, until I decided to declare my independence and drop below licensing requirements. I guess I am still a homeschooler at heart.
Open-Ended Toys
While the skills and experiences gained through outside play are invaluable, that serves as only half of the equation of low-tech learning. The rest is in old-fashioned ways of teaching. On this front I agree with about half of what most early childhood experts push in this particular concept. They advocate making sure that the environment of young children contains many basic, open-ended toys such as blocks, empty containers, etc. Open-ended toys do provide the opportunity for children to use their imagination more. However, even though they advocate open-ended toys, they would have declared my toys as a child to be hazards. People, you just cannot have it both ways. Sticks and rocks and broken toys made up 3/4 of my childhood. Perfectly safe environments remove a lot of opportunity for children to learn about risk and the brokenness that makes up the world we live in.
The Value of Direct Instruction
The point where I diverge from the early childhood experts comes down to the actual teaching. I believe 1000% in direct instruction for most concepts. I despise child-centered curriculums with a passion because I have witnessed the horrendous results of such curriculums when used in their purest forms in the homeschooling world. Children need to be taught not led. If you have to rely on leading a child, you open up both you and the child to be subject to the foolish whims of childhood. There is a reason God put the verse, "Foolishness is bound up in the heart of a child. Only discipline will remove it far from him,"in the Bible. We have so idealized childhood that we no longer understand that some things in childhood should not carry over to the adult world. Early childhood experts do not even acknowledge that children have foolishness coming out their ears at times. All they talk about is reclaiming the magic of childhood and always holding onto the sense of wonder. In the real world, a child's sense of wonder comes with a great deal of unrealistic expectations and flat-out ignorance. Acquiring wisdom requires that we "put away childish things."
In summary, low-tech learning requires that children have many, many, many opportunities to handle natural materials and open-ended toys. Free-play must constitute a great deal of a child's day. When teaching is done, it must be precise and to the point directly instructing a child in the concepts that are necessary in today's world. Technology needs to be a compliment and not the main source of any instruction. For very young children technology is not even necessary, in my opinion.
I hope you have enjoyed this post. Goodbye and God bless!! Check out Natalie's children's books at: https://www.amazon.com/author/nataliewade7457
Tuesday, April 8, 2014
Dealing with Destructive Children
This post will look at the huge problem of destructiveness in children. Some children are destructive out of spite and meanness. Some children are destructive in a way that is not on purpose. I will look at both types of destructiveness.
The Scenario
As childcare providers or even parents we have seen the scenario all too often where a child gets angry and completely destroys whatever is closest to him/her. We also have those children that just seem to be masters of disaster. They do not mean to break things but they always manage to do so. Either way as business owners or parents we are constantly having to replace the broken items or just do without. Many parents do not understand how costly this one issue has made running a childcare in recent years. This is especially true for those individuals unfortunate enough to live in highly regulated states. For those people doing without is not even an option. Every thing must be replaced as soon as it is damaged.
The "Poof" Environment
What has caused this massive uptick in destructive behavior in children? I blame our "poof" environments undergirded by child-centered regulations. When I was a child, breaking toys meant they were gone forever. I played with many dolls without arms and legs and even heads because I did not get a new one except for Christmas. My toys did not magically reappear when I lost them or damaged them. Yet, that is exactly what many regulations require. In many states we have to maintain a certain amount of items especially items that promote diversity. If the children happen to completely destroy these items, we have to replace them or get docked for it. This teaches the children that stuff will magically reappear if they destroy it. They do not realize how financially burdensome this particular brand of magic is for their providers. All they know is that they will always have what they have no matter how badly they treat it. This teaches a horrible lesson, and is, in my opinion, the biggest contributor to the destructive behavior we see.
No More "Poof" Environment for Me
I happen to live in one of those states that has such regulations, and since I have dropped below licensing level, I feel as if I have been freed from slavery. Now, when the children break things in my childcare, they feel the pain of doing without. Nothing magically reappears in my childcare. Does this cause weeping and gnashing of teeth? Absolutely, and that brings me to the second biggest reason for destructive behavior in children. The philosophy that children's childhood should be magical and without unhappiness puts providers in a precarious situation when those darling little angels break $300 worth of toys in a morning. If we make them do without, they just might (gasp) cry. We should never do things in our childcares that make the children unhappy according to many early childhood experts. I have seen childcare providers nearly come unglued because a child decided to have a crying fit when a state person was in the house. Did it matter that the child was being destructive or manipulative? Absolutely not. The state people want you to comfort that child pronto and do whatever is necessary to keep that child from "stress." Guess what state people, a little stress is healthy for a child especially when that child is behaving badly.
The Entitled Generation
We are raising one of the most spoiled generations to ever come down the pike, and we are already paying for it. You do not have to watch the news very long at all these days before you come across a story about someone walking all over another person to get what he/she wants. Creating an entitled society will be our absolute demise probably sooner than we know. Someone has to take care of the entitled. What will we do when everyone feels entitled, and we no longer have anyone to take care of them? Anyone ever heard of Big Brother? I am afraid that one of these days our reality will make some apocalyptic literature seem like a walk in the park.
The Nutrition Connection
I have talked about the deliberately destructive, but we also seem to have a huge uptick in children that cannot seem to control themselves. They do not deliberately destroy things, but they are just as destructive as the other bunch. These children tend to be big for their age and unable to sit still or focus for more than two seconds. Small children can also fit into this category, but it has been my experience that these children trend to the obese and overweight children. Over the years I have tried to find common denominators in these children, and this is what I have observed. Number one, these children tend to be picky eaters even if they are small. They hardly ever eat vegetables and sometimes fruit. They also tend to be the ones particular about their milk. Either they hate milk, or they have to have flavored milk. The picky eating also seems to come into play with the deliberately destructive. It seems that either lack of nutrition causes children to be destructive and/or the causes for picky eating and destructive behavior stem from the same source. Either way, fixing the picky eating fixes quite a bit of the destructive behavior as well. When I took away the flavored milk and really developed my menu to contain lots of fresh fruits and vegetables, I cut down a massive amount of the destructive behavior I was seeing. When I started new children, it took 6 to 9 months to get results (with much wailing and gnashing of teeth over the food), but when those children finally learned to eat their vegetables and drink white milk, they calmed down considerably.
Bad Sleeping Habits Connection
The second common denominator is bad sleeping habits. These children tend to be the bad nappers or be the ones the parents swear do not need a nap anymore. They also have inconsistent bedtimes. Again, this holds true for the deliberately destructive as well as the non-deliberately destructive. Basically, this boils down to the children being constantly overstimulated. Sleep for young children is far more important than anyone today will actually admit because again you are running into having to constantly make children happy. Taking a nap makes some children completely ballistic, and it is usually those children that need the nap the most. At my childcare, nap has never been an option. I have taken my hits for that over the years because for me that one is non-negotiable. I refuse to have to take care of children that are constantly overstimulated. It is completely unnecessary.
I hope you have enjoyed this post. Goodbye and God bless!! Check out Natalie's children's books at: https://www.amazon.com/author/nataliewade7457
The Scenario
As childcare providers or even parents we have seen the scenario all too often where a child gets angry and completely destroys whatever is closest to him/her. We also have those children that just seem to be masters of disaster. They do not mean to break things but they always manage to do so. Either way as business owners or parents we are constantly having to replace the broken items or just do without. Many parents do not understand how costly this one issue has made running a childcare in recent years. This is especially true for those individuals unfortunate enough to live in highly regulated states. For those people doing without is not even an option. Every thing must be replaced as soon as it is damaged.
The "Poof" Environment
What has caused this massive uptick in destructive behavior in children? I blame our "poof" environments undergirded by child-centered regulations. When I was a child, breaking toys meant they were gone forever. I played with many dolls without arms and legs and even heads because I did not get a new one except for Christmas. My toys did not magically reappear when I lost them or damaged them. Yet, that is exactly what many regulations require. In many states we have to maintain a certain amount of items especially items that promote diversity. If the children happen to completely destroy these items, we have to replace them or get docked for it. This teaches the children that stuff will magically reappear if they destroy it. They do not realize how financially burdensome this particular brand of magic is for their providers. All they know is that they will always have what they have no matter how badly they treat it. This teaches a horrible lesson, and is, in my opinion, the biggest contributor to the destructive behavior we see.
No More "Poof" Environment for Me
I happen to live in one of those states that has such regulations, and since I have dropped below licensing level, I feel as if I have been freed from slavery. Now, when the children break things in my childcare, they feel the pain of doing without. Nothing magically reappears in my childcare. Does this cause weeping and gnashing of teeth? Absolutely, and that brings me to the second biggest reason for destructive behavior in children. The philosophy that children's childhood should be magical and without unhappiness puts providers in a precarious situation when those darling little angels break $300 worth of toys in a morning. If we make them do without, they just might (gasp) cry. We should never do things in our childcares that make the children unhappy according to many early childhood experts. I have seen childcare providers nearly come unglued because a child decided to have a crying fit when a state person was in the house. Did it matter that the child was being destructive or manipulative? Absolutely not. The state people want you to comfort that child pronto and do whatever is necessary to keep that child from "stress." Guess what state people, a little stress is healthy for a child especially when that child is behaving badly.
The Entitled Generation
We are raising one of the most spoiled generations to ever come down the pike, and we are already paying for it. You do not have to watch the news very long at all these days before you come across a story about someone walking all over another person to get what he/she wants. Creating an entitled society will be our absolute demise probably sooner than we know. Someone has to take care of the entitled. What will we do when everyone feels entitled, and we no longer have anyone to take care of them? Anyone ever heard of Big Brother? I am afraid that one of these days our reality will make some apocalyptic literature seem like a walk in the park.
The Nutrition Connection
I have talked about the deliberately destructive, but we also seem to have a huge uptick in children that cannot seem to control themselves. They do not deliberately destroy things, but they are just as destructive as the other bunch. These children tend to be big for their age and unable to sit still or focus for more than two seconds. Small children can also fit into this category, but it has been my experience that these children trend to the obese and overweight children. Over the years I have tried to find common denominators in these children, and this is what I have observed. Number one, these children tend to be picky eaters even if they are small. They hardly ever eat vegetables and sometimes fruit. They also tend to be the ones particular about their milk. Either they hate milk, or they have to have flavored milk. The picky eating also seems to come into play with the deliberately destructive. It seems that either lack of nutrition causes children to be destructive and/or the causes for picky eating and destructive behavior stem from the same source. Either way, fixing the picky eating fixes quite a bit of the destructive behavior as well. When I took away the flavored milk and really developed my menu to contain lots of fresh fruits and vegetables, I cut down a massive amount of the destructive behavior I was seeing. When I started new children, it took 6 to 9 months to get results (with much wailing and gnashing of teeth over the food), but when those children finally learned to eat their vegetables and drink white milk, they calmed down considerably.
Bad Sleeping Habits Connection
The second common denominator is bad sleeping habits. These children tend to be the bad nappers or be the ones the parents swear do not need a nap anymore. They also have inconsistent bedtimes. Again, this holds true for the deliberately destructive as well as the non-deliberately destructive. Basically, this boils down to the children being constantly overstimulated. Sleep for young children is far more important than anyone today will actually admit because again you are running into having to constantly make children happy. Taking a nap makes some children completely ballistic, and it is usually those children that need the nap the most. At my childcare, nap has never been an option. I have taken my hits for that over the years because for me that one is non-negotiable. I refuse to have to take care of children that are constantly overstimulated. It is completely unnecessary.
I hope you have enjoyed this post. Goodbye and God bless!! Check out Natalie's children's books at: https://www.amazon.com/author/nataliewade7457
Sunday, April 6, 2014
The High Tech Learning Style
This post will look at those people that learn best when utilizing technology. In the early childhood world this actually stirs up some controversy. Many early childhood experts believe that very young children should be exposed to as little technology as possible to give them the opportunity to develop skills that seem to be suffering since the advent of high tech learning. I will look at this and the other side that believes that we should take advantage of the tech savviness all small children seem to have.
For the Love of Sesame Street
I will start this discussion with my own experience in childhood with what was considered high-tech learning at the time. I did not attend preschool. My preschool experience was Sesame Street. How much did I learn from watching Sesame Street? Quite a bit. I learned all my letters and sounds. I learned my numbers, shapes, and all that basic information. Sesame Street from the 70s did a marvelous job of teaching children the preschool basics. I also watched Mr. Rogers Neighborhood and The Electric Company. Therefore, I spent about 1 hour and 30 minutes every weekday learning from a high-tech source. The rest of my day was spent in free-play either outside or in the house.
Fluff or Substance
Now, high tech learning involves the internet and various and assorted electronic gadgets of all kinds as well as educational television. How much do children today learn from all this educational media? Here is where we hit the sticking point. The educational television of the 1970s was very academic dense. The format that was used was cutting edge, but they did not worry as much about entertainment value as they do now. Now what passes for high-tech learning is much more fluff than academics sometimes. When it is academic rich, sometimes it is too helpful to be as effective as those first high-tech learning experiences. Technology has become a crutch for us as a society, and that is passing down to our children.
The Need for Free Play
Another huge difference between my experience with high-tech learning and today's children's experience, revolves around the amount of free-play time I had. Free-play could easily be put on the endangered species list. My high-tech learning was offset by the enormous amount of free-play time I enjoyed. Today children spend much more than 1 hour and 30 minutes in front of some sort of screen. Plus, unless all they watch is PBS, it is nowhere near the academic content of my 1 hour and 30 minutes of screen time. Today's educational video games help the children too much to be anywhere near as effective as the first seasons of Sesame Street. In fact, all educational programming has evolved to be much more watered down for various and assorted reasons. What are those reasons? Many of them I find to be flat-out racist. If I were a minority, I would be completely insulted when they insinuate that my children are less capable of picking up educational concepts than other races. However, that is exactly the reasoning given for the dumbing down of everything these days. They do not state it exactly like that, but that is exactly what they mean.
The Need for Low-Tech Learning in the Early Years
With all that said, I actually fall into the camp of the anti-high-tech learning for toddlers and preschoolers. I do not mind a small amount of exposure to good quality high-tech learning as long as it is greatly offset by free-play and low-tech learning. Most of today's children get enough exposure to technology simply because many parents hand them a cell phone to keep them entertained when the parents have had enough. Therefore, many of today's children are in desperate need of low-tech learning experiences. They can probably manipulate a cell phone better than I can, but are they learning the preschool basics from their experience? NO!!!! What they learn makes all the difference in the world as to how effective the learning is for the children.
The Balance
Then why are all the schools so completely sold on transferring to a high-tech learning environment? Here is where the early childhood community and the public educational world butt heads constantly. The public educational system has a point that children of today's society must be able to function in a highly digital world. The early childhood community has a point that technology is becoming a crutch for people in today's society actually lowering our intelligence as compared to previous generations. Where is the middle ground in this argument? Actually if you take both camps arguments and apply them to the other side in a way, you will get your answer. Learning to manipulate technology is important, but not when that technology does the thinking for the person. Basic learning probably does need to stay in the low-tech world until the child has a good grasp on the basics.
High-Tech in the Early Years
Now let us take this into the early childhood world. Is it all right to give young children exposure to high-tech learning? I say yes as long as you, the teacher, are doing most of the teaching and leave the practice of skills to high-tech learning devices. If you are relying on technology to do the teaching for you, then you are not using high-tech learning devices in a way that will truly benefit the child long term. The same is true when children reach school-age. If the teachers are leaving the teaching to the high-tech devices, you may want to find your child a different teacher. We actually ran into this problem with one of my granddaughter's teachers. This teacher was trying to teach many skills solely through high-tech learning methods and my granddaughter basically lost an entire year of instruction. Fortunately, in the next grade her teacher was marvelous and fixed a multitude of issues. However, my granddaughter loves math games on the computer. She benefits from practice of skills on high-tech learning devices, but she needs the teacher to teach the basics first. In today's society many, many children can benefit from practice of skills using high-tech devices because of their natural savviness with such devices, but please do not overlook the direct instruction necessary for the teaching of initial concepts. AND do not overlook a child's need for free-play times away from all screens.
I hope you have enjoyed this post. Goodbye and God bless!! Check out Natalie's children's books at: https://www.amazon.com/author/nataliewade7457
For the Love of Sesame Street
I will start this discussion with my own experience in childhood with what was considered high-tech learning at the time. I did not attend preschool. My preschool experience was Sesame Street. How much did I learn from watching Sesame Street? Quite a bit. I learned all my letters and sounds. I learned my numbers, shapes, and all that basic information. Sesame Street from the 70s did a marvelous job of teaching children the preschool basics. I also watched Mr. Rogers Neighborhood and The Electric Company. Therefore, I spent about 1 hour and 30 minutes every weekday learning from a high-tech source. The rest of my day was spent in free-play either outside or in the house.
Fluff or Substance
Now, high tech learning involves the internet and various and assorted electronic gadgets of all kinds as well as educational television. How much do children today learn from all this educational media? Here is where we hit the sticking point. The educational television of the 1970s was very academic dense. The format that was used was cutting edge, but they did not worry as much about entertainment value as they do now. Now what passes for high-tech learning is much more fluff than academics sometimes. When it is academic rich, sometimes it is too helpful to be as effective as those first high-tech learning experiences. Technology has become a crutch for us as a society, and that is passing down to our children.
The Need for Free Play
Another huge difference between my experience with high-tech learning and today's children's experience, revolves around the amount of free-play time I had. Free-play could easily be put on the endangered species list. My high-tech learning was offset by the enormous amount of free-play time I enjoyed. Today children spend much more than 1 hour and 30 minutes in front of some sort of screen. Plus, unless all they watch is PBS, it is nowhere near the academic content of my 1 hour and 30 minutes of screen time. Today's educational video games help the children too much to be anywhere near as effective as the first seasons of Sesame Street. In fact, all educational programming has evolved to be much more watered down for various and assorted reasons. What are those reasons? Many of them I find to be flat-out racist. If I were a minority, I would be completely insulted when they insinuate that my children are less capable of picking up educational concepts than other races. However, that is exactly the reasoning given for the dumbing down of everything these days. They do not state it exactly like that, but that is exactly what they mean.
The Need for Low-Tech Learning in the Early Years
With all that said, I actually fall into the camp of the anti-high-tech learning for toddlers and preschoolers. I do not mind a small amount of exposure to good quality high-tech learning as long as it is greatly offset by free-play and low-tech learning. Most of today's children get enough exposure to technology simply because many parents hand them a cell phone to keep them entertained when the parents have had enough. Therefore, many of today's children are in desperate need of low-tech learning experiences. They can probably manipulate a cell phone better than I can, but are they learning the preschool basics from their experience? NO!!!! What they learn makes all the difference in the world as to how effective the learning is for the children.
The Balance
Then why are all the schools so completely sold on transferring to a high-tech learning environment? Here is where the early childhood community and the public educational world butt heads constantly. The public educational system has a point that children of today's society must be able to function in a highly digital world. The early childhood community has a point that technology is becoming a crutch for people in today's society actually lowering our intelligence as compared to previous generations. Where is the middle ground in this argument? Actually if you take both camps arguments and apply them to the other side in a way, you will get your answer. Learning to manipulate technology is important, but not when that technology does the thinking for the person. Basic learning probably does need to stay in the low-tech world until the child has a good grasp on the basics.
High-Tech in the Early Years
Now let us take this into the early childhood world. Is it all right to give young children exposure to high-tech learning? I say yes as long as you, the teacher, are doing most of the teaching and leave the practice of skills to high-tech learning devices. If you are relying on technology to do the teaching for you, then you are not using high-tech learning devices in a way that will truly benefit the child long term. The same is true when children reach school-age. If the teachers are leaving the teaching to the high-tech devices, you may want to find your child a different teacher. We actually ran into this problem with one of my granddaughter's teachers. This teacher was trying to teach many skills solely through high-tech learning methods and my granddaughter basically lost an entire year of instruction. Fortunately, in the next grade her teacher was marvelous and fixed a multitude of issues. However, my granddaughter loves math games on the computer. She benefits from practice of skills on high-tech learning devices, but she needs the teacher to teach the basics first. In today's society many, many children can benefit from practice of skills using high-tech devices because of their natural savviness with such devices, but please do not overlook the direct instruction necessary for the teaching of initial concepts. AND do not overlook a child's need for free-play times away from all screens.
I hope you have enjoyed this post. Goodbye and God bless!! Check out Natalie's children's books at: https://www.amazon.com/author/nataliewade7457
Tuesday, April 1, 2014
Dealing with Out of Control Children
This post will deal with the ever increasing problem of children that refuse to be controlled. We all have seen the scenario. A child, usually big for his/her age, gets angry with the caregiver/teacher and gets violent. Many of us have been punched, bitten, kicked, had things thrown at us, etc. This ugly scenario plays out every day in childcares all over America. Where did this come from?
The New Level of Aggression
I can attest that when I went to school any child in the early grades that even dared look at the teacher hard could be cowed back down without incident. In middle school we did start to have issues with children getting violent with teachers even in the 70s, 80s, and 90s. However, now we have the middle school issues in preschool. Many longtime preschool teachers will attest that the level of aggression toward adults by children has grown to a level that is forcing many of them to leave the field. Personally I have been bitten, punched, kicked, and had objects thrown in my direction by children as young as two. I will not deny that in those moments I consider heavily why I bother with this profession.
What Causes Zero-Tolerance Policies in Preschool
Much has been made in the media lately about children being kicked out of preschool. The spin on much of this coverage has been on the disproportionate number of minority children that are removed from preschools. They also discussed the zero tolerance policies that many preschools and elementary schools now have in place. What they did not discuss was why do all these schools have such strict disciplinary policies in place now. Some of the stranger policies actually stem from overzealous regulations. For example, when a child is removed from a preschool for using their finger as a gun, that is because in the scales used to rate preschools any form of violence or violent play will cause the caregiver to be either wrote up or docked. However, I will tell you that the majority of the push for such stringent disciplinary codes comes down to out of control children. As a teacher, I do not care what color a child may be when that child doubles up his/her fist and punches another child or teacher in the face. That child is not coming back, period. When this problem is coupled with the expectations of many parents that their child have a wonderful school experience all the time, you get the zero tolerance policies we now see in almost every school.
What Do We Do?
This problem is actually so multi-faceted that nailing down one cause cannot be done. This problem has come to us through years and years of several bad philosophies and parenting styles. It seems to me that parenting and childcare went off of a tangent in the late 1980s that has been building and building until we now find ourselves overpowered, manipulated, and sometimes flat out scared of our children. To fix this will require more than I think our society is willing to do. We must admit that some of our beloved theories about childhood are skewed and flat out wrong. However, I am not the only one sounding this alarm. More and more I come across articles that say exactly what I say week after week. So what do we need to throw out?
Unrealistic Expectations for Childhood
Removing the unrealistic expectations for childhood needs to be the first item out the window. Most of the violent outbursts by children come down to the child not getting his/her way. We have made more than one generation of children believe that they are entitled to whatever they want. We, as parents, have tried to make our children's childhood magical and everything we never got. Instead of creating well-balanced, satisfied children, we have created selfish, irrational beings that cannot deal with not getting what they want all the time. Guess what people, bring back the chores and having to do things that are not fun whether you like it or not, and you will get well-balanced, satisfied children.
Helicopter Parenting
The next item that needs to fly out the window is helicopter parenting. I read an article this week that talked about why millenials have a harder time getting and holding down a job. The article, written by a human resource professional of a large company, blamed helicopter parenting. I nearly jumped up and down and applauded. She actually told stories of how parents accompanied their grown children to a job interview. When children are not raised to do for themselves, it causes problems in more ways than I can cover in one article, but it does contribute to the violent meltdowns we see in children. They do not know how to handle hardly any situation on their own and often rely on violent measures to cope. Back off parents and let your children learn to handle life on their own. They cannot become functioning adults unless they are allowed to learn from their mistakes large and small.
The Fallen Nature
The last item involves something that needs to come back in the window not be thrown out. As a society we must come to terms with mankind's fallen nature. We are born into this world fully capable of sin without assistance. We do not need to be taught to do wrong. Are you aware that every single early childhood theorist that is revered in the early childhood community did not believe in the fallen nature of man? That presents a massive problem because that means that those theories are built on the wrong foundation. I am sorry to inform you that we will never evolve out of our fallen nature. However, to admit this particular piece of information means you have to admit that God is right and man is wrong. When God said, "All have sinned and come short of the glory of God," He meant it. Our society does not even want to admit the existence of God much less that He is right about the condition of our souls. Until you view children as fully capable of sin without assistance, your efforts to correct behavior can never have the same results as when you base your strategies on that foundation. The tangent started when we became convinced that we knew better than God how to raise our children. Guess what, people? We have made the most colossal mess this world has seen in many, many, many generations.
I hope you have enjoyed this post. Goodbye and God bless!! Check out Natalie's children's books at: https://www.amazon.com/author/nataliewade7457
The New Level of Aggression
I can attest that when I went to school any child in the early grades that even dared look at the teacher hard could be cowed back down without incident. In middle school we did start to have issues with children getting violent with teachers even in the 70s, 80s, and 90s. However, now we have the middle school issues in preschool. Many longtime preschool teachers will attest that the level of aggression toward adults by children has grown to a level that is forcing many of them to leave the field. Personally I have been bitten, punched, kicked, and had objects thrown in my direction by children as young as two. I will not deny that in those moments I consider heavily why I bother with this profession.
What Causes Zero-Tolerance Policies in Preschool
Much has been made in the media lately about children being kicked out of preschool. The spin on much of this coverage has been on the disproportionate number of minority children that are removed from preschools. They also discussed the zero tolerance policies that many preschools and elementary schools now have in place. What they did not discuss was why do all these schools have such strict disciplinary policies in place now. Some of the stranger policies actually stem from overzealous regulations. For example, when a child is removed from a preschool for using their finger as a gun, that is because in the scales used to rate preschools any form of violence or violent play will cause the caregiver to be either wrote up or docked. However, I will tell you that the majority of the push for such stringent disciplinary codes comes down to out of control children. As a teacher, I do not care what color a child may be when that child doubles up his/her fist and punches another child or teacher in the face. That child is not coming back, period. When this problem is coupled with the expectations of many parents that their child have a wonderful school experience all the time, you get the zero tolerance policies we now see in almost every school.
What Do We Do?
This problem is actually so multi-faceted that nailing down one cause cannot be done. This problem has come to us through years and years of several bad philosophies and parenting styles. It seems to me that parenting and childcare went off of a tangent in the late 1980s that has been building and building until we now find ourselves overpowered, manipulated, and sometimes flat out scared of our children. To fix this will require more than I think our society is willing to do. We must admit that some of our beloved theories about childhood are skewed and flat out wrong. However, I am not the only one sounding this alarm. More and more I come across articles that say exactly what I say week after week. So what do we need to throw out?
Unrealistic Expectations for Childhood
Removing the unrealistic expectations for childhood needs to be the first item out the window. Most of the violent outbursts by children come down to the child not getting his/her way. We have made more than one generation of children believe that they are entitled to whatever they want. We, as parents, have tried to make our children's childhood magical and everything we never got. Instead of creating well-balanced, satisfied children, we have created selfish, irrational beings that cannot deal with not getting what they want all the time. Guess what people, bring back the chores and having to do things that are not fun whether you like it or not, and you will get well-balanced, satisfied children.
Helicopter Parenting
The next item that needs to fly out the window is helicopter parenting. I read an article this week that talked about why millenials have a harder time getting and holding down a job. The article, written by a human resource professional of a large company, blamed helicopter parenting. I nearly jumped up and down and applauded. She actually told stories of how parents accompanied their grown children to a job interview. When children are not raised to do for themselves, it causes problems in more ways than I can cover in one article, but it does contribute to the violent meltdowns we see in children. They do not know how to handle hardly any situation on their own and often rely on violent measures to cope. Back off parents and let your children learn to handle life on their own. They cannot become functioning adults unless they are allowed to learn from their mistakes large and small.
The Fallen Nature
The last item involves something that needs to come back in the window not be thrown out. As a society we must come to terms with mankind's fallen nature. We are born into this world fully capable of sin without assistance. We do not need to be taught to do wrong. Are you aware that every single early childhood theorist that is revered in the early childhood community did not believe in the fallen nature of man? That presents a massive problem because that means that those theories are built on the wrong foundation. I am sorry to inform you that we will never evolve out of our fallen nature. However, to admit this particular piece of information means you have to admit that God is right and man is wrong. When God said, "All have sinned and come short of the glory of God," He meant it. Our society does not even want to admit the existence of God much less that He is right about the condition of our souls. Until you view children as fully capable of sin without assistance, your efforts to correct behavior can never have the same results as when you base your strategies on that foundation. The tangent started when we became convinced that we knew better than God how to raise our children. Guess what, people? We have made the most colossal mess this world has seen in many, many, many generations.
I hope you have enjoyed this post. Goodbye and God bless!! Check out Natalie's children's books at: https://www.amazon.com/author/nataliewade7457
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