This post will look at those children that thrive in one-on-one learning situations and self-study situations. I actually think this may be the next big thing in education outside of the established educational world. People already go to college online and study on their own to earn everything from bachelors degrees to doctorates. I do believe this will filter down into the high school, middle school, and elementary years very soon. To some degree, this trend is already here. Many online schools now exist for even elementary students to study from home.
My Forte - Solitary Learning
This particular learning style represents my forte as both a student and a teacher. I homeschooled my own children for 13 years. My childcare is set up for one-one-one instruction for every child every day. I also graduated with my masters degree having completed the entire degree through online courses. To be honest, if online education had existed when I was growing up, I would have thrived on such a proposition. My peers in public school were so far behind me that I basically taught myself and them throughout my entire school career, and that includes my secondary education as well. If I had been allowed to progress at my own pace, I might have gone a great deal further than I actually did. That represents a large percentage of my reasoning for homeschooling my own children. I wanted to give them the opportunity to go as far as they could without having to be held back by their peers. Did it work? I believe it truly did for my middle child. She hit high school able to go the honor courses route and was able to be surrounded by peers that were her equal. My son, however, went into public school in middle school in the 7th grade so he could play football. That was nearly disastrous. When he hit high school, he had to make up massive ground in order to follow his sister in the honor course route. Those two years that his sister received at home made a huge difference for her, and he will readily admit that. I credit his solid foundation before he hit public school for being able to pull up and hang with the honor course route, but he had to work for it. In case you do not know this, a great divide exists in the public school between general courses and honor courses. This reality holds true for most of the country. Unless your child can hang with the honor courses in public school, the quality of the education that your child receives will not be anywhere near the caliber of the education of those that do. If the school your child attends does not have honor courses, most of the time it falls into the general course reality.
The Ugly Trend in Education
I am about to really dive into the ugly reality of education in America today. When I homeschooled in the 1990s, we were the fringe of society. The homeschool movement was in its infancy. Now, the homeschool movement has grown considerably thanks to the internet. One of the fastest growing sectors of the educational world is online academies. Many, many parents choose the path of homeschooling now to pull their children out of failing schools. This also explains the exponential rise of charter schools. I did not realize how much this particular trend has grown until recently. I have been going into schools to read my book, Lily's Feather Kite. I recently went into a town that when I was going to school was a really nice school system. I was shocked at what I found. I visited every kindergarten class in the public school system that served this particular town and found that 80-90% of the children were minorities. I could not help but ask myself where all the white children had gone. This particular town did not have a population that was 80-90% minorities. After asking some people with relatives in this town, I found out that everyone that can sends their children to private schools in a nearby larger town. Those that cannot afford private schools, homeschool. Only the poorest white children attend the public school. Affluent minority families do the same as the affluent white families. Only the poor attend public school. Turns out, this a growing trend in metropolitan areas all over the country.
Is Solitary Learning Superior?
Since solitary learning situations are very much on the rise, are they better for children than our present educational systems? The answer to that question is mostly yes especially in the early grades. I have been preaching for post after post about the importance of children being able to proceed down their education path at their own pace and ability. Only in the solitary learning situations can this reality be fully met. When children receive their instruction in a one-one-one setting whether it involves face to face teachers or internet courses, they have the freedom to work on their weaknesses until they are conquered and delve into their strengths with a passion. Public school education may never be able to really go here. Charter schools thrive because they have smaller class sizes and some have the freedom to group children according to ability rather than age. This gives the teachers more time to devote to individual instruction, which will always produce greater results. We are individuals. Education should be an individual endeavor.
Some Problems with Solitary Learning
What are some problems that arise in the solitary learning situation? Not every child can handle self-study situations. Many children can learn from an online venue. However, children with slight to severe developmental delays really need a human teacher in which to interact. The subtleties of teaching this population requires the intuition of a human teacher. A machine just cannot do the same. Some children actually do better in a social setting because they are pushed by their peers. If these children are left to go at their own pace, the pace will be way too slow. It does not take a large class to motivate these types of children, but they do need some peers to give them the extra push they need. In order to handle a self-study situation, a child or adult needs to be self-motivated. However, I have not seen a child that did not benefit from a teacher/student one-on-one relationship unless the teacher was incompetent. There are some parents that have no business homeschooling. It takes consistency and discipline that some parents do not possess. When a competent teacher enters into a one-on-one situation with a child, that child flourishes whether that child is advanced or severely developmentally delayed. I am speaking purely from an academic standpoint. Learning social/relationship lessons does require peers. In past centuries, the affluent understood that academic lessons and social lessons did not have to come from the same source. Parents provided tutors for academics and other means for gaining social competencies. This is how homeschool parents function. They understand that the two types of learning do not have to be married. One day the rest of the educational world will figure this out.
Solitary Learning in the Preschool World
What does this learning style look like in a preschool setting? I will tell you that it does require smaller class sizes. Providers that care for less than 10 children will be in a better position to use this style of teaching. Basically, it involves having individual lesson plans for each child. At some point in the day, each child will receive a one-on-one session that covers those lesson plans. These lessons do not have to exceed five minutes for two year olds or 20 minutes for children nearly at the kindergarten level. However, the consistent building of concepts one upon another that this style accomplishes cannot be equaled. Those five minute sessions with two year olds will produce three year olds that know their colors, shapes, and maybe even numbers and some letters depending on the individual child. I have seen this system produce results that completely baffle those unfamiliar with it. For the rest of the day, the children play and interact in a couple of group times. This is what a true academic preschool looks like from a homeschooling mom's perspective. When I speak of an academic preschool, this is what I mean.
I hope you have enjoyed this post. Goodbye and God bless!!
Check out Natalie's children's books at: https://www.amazon.com/author/nataliewade7457
Saturday, May 17, 2014
Wednesday, May 14, 2014
Dealing with Picky Eaters - What is the Big Deal?
This post will look at the problem of picky eating in children and what the short and long term consequences can be for having poor eating habits. In today's society when obesity makes the headlines almost every day, this subject should be making the headlines every day as well. However, there seems to be a big disconnect between the obesity epidemic and picky eating habits. I truly believe that our society suffers from extreme denial about how their eating habits affect their overall health and well-being.
Americans and Their Food
We as Americans do not like to breach the subject of picky eating because we hold our tastes in food to be a very personal thing. We like what we like, and we do not want to have to eat what we do not like no matter how much our body may need the nutrients in that particular food. We would rather take a pill or use any other means possible to get those nutrients without having to eat a food we dislike. On top of that, we will deny to our dying breath that we have bad eating habits, and will get absolutely hostile with anyone that tries to tell us otherwise. This applies to as many adults as it does children. However, the level of the picky eating does seem to be growing exponentially with every passing generation.
Picky Eating over the Generations
When I was a child, we did not necessarily like to eat our vegetables, but it was more required than it is now. When my generation grew up and became parents, we tended to not require the vegetables as much as our parents did. We let our children grow up to be pickier than we were allowed to be. Now our children have grown up, and their children do not even know what a vegetable looks like. In the 9 years that I have been a provider, I have noticed a considerable uptick in picky eating that has gotten to the epidemic stage in the last couple of years. Not only will they not eat vegetables, many of them will not eat fruit, meat that is not breaded and/or fried, bread that is not white, and milk that is not flavored. I have even seen a good proportion of children that will not touch macaroni and cheese when they first arrive on my doorstep. People, this is getting out of hand.
Our Family Pact
Unlike my peers, I was more adamant about my children eating their vegetables than even my parents. When I first married my husband, he was the pickiest eater I had ever met. I had a great deal of nutrition training in high school thanks to a very good home economics teacher, and I knew the consequences of bad eating habits. Therefore, when we had children we made a pact to eat some of everything on the table whether we liked it or not because my husband understood what his eating habits had already done to his health. He also understood that he would have to model better eating habits or his children would end up with the same issues he already had in his 20s. It was tough for him to learn to eat better as an adult. I did not make it very easy for him either. I fixed 3 different vegetables with every meal. He learned to eat even spinach and beets without too much of a fuss as long as I only fixed those occasionally. When we married, his idea of a vegetable was mashed potatoes. He would not even eat yellow corn only white. Basically, he only ate foods that were brown and white. Does that sound familiar?
Today's Picky Eaters
Of course, now I have been exposed to children that make my husband look like the healthiest eater in the world. They will not eat mashed potatoes. They fuss if the chicken nuggets are baked instead of fried. If you hand them white milk, they just might throw it at you. The hostility over the food has also increased exponentially. Many parents have completely given up (or never even tried) on getting their children to eat much beyond chicken nuggets and french fries. I had one kid that would only eat pop tarts and drink apple juice. Many parents complicate this by fixing a separate meal for their children. Every member of the family gets to choose from a variety of frozen meals for supper. Meals are not planned. Many children in today's society are not even exposed to vegetables and sometimes fruits before they arrive on the doorstep of childcares and schools.
What's the Big Deal?
The title of this post is "What is the Big Deal?" Many people ask that very question when the subject of picky eating comes up. There was a show several years back that answered that question in a very graphic way at times. It was called "Honey We Are Killing Our Kids." In this show the producers would take a computer simulation and factor in a child's present eating habits to show the parents what the long-term effects of the vitamin and mineral deficiencies would do to their children. It also factored in the amount of exercise, but the descriptions of the long-term effects of bad eating habits stunned most parents. Of course, this show was cancelled because American people do not want to hear about the effects of their children's eating habits. However, I wish this was required for all preschool parents. People, it is a big deal. When your children go years without eating anything resembling a vegetable or a fruit, it has consequences. It affects the tone, color, and clearness of their skin. It affects the luster of their hair. One of the most shocking parts of the simulation for parents was the hair loss that ensued because of vitamin deficiencies even for girls. Of course, it affects their weight. Any nutritionist worth anything will tell you that a weight loss plan that does not include a lot of vegetables will not result in long-term weight loss. Period. The past generations had a reason for making their children eat their vegetables. They understood that a person cannot be truly healthy without them. We as a society will have to very soon come to terms with this reality or be crushed by medical expenses and other bad consequences.
I hope you have enjoyed this post. Goodbye and God bless!! Check out Natalie's children's books at: https://www.amazon.com/author/nataliewade7457
Americans and Their Food
We as Americans do not like to breach the subject of picky eating because we hold our tastes in food to be a very personal thing. We like what we like, and we do not want to have to eat what we do not like no matter how much our body may need the nutrients in that particular food. We would rather take a pill or use any other means possible to get those nutrients without having to eat a food we dislike. On top of that, we will deny to our dying breath that we have bad eating habits, and will get absolutely hostile with anyone that tries to tell us otherwise. This applies to as many adults as it does children. However, the level of the picky eating does seem to be growing exponentially with every passing generation.
Picky Eating over the Generations
When I was a child, we did not necessarily like to eat our vegetables, but it was more required than it is now. When my generation grew up and became parents, we tended to not require the vegetables as much as our parents did. We let our children grow up to be pickier than we were allowed to be. Now our children have grown up, and their children do not even know what a vegetable looks like. In the 9 years that I have been a provider, I have noticed a considerable uptick in picky eating that has gotten to the epidemic stage in the last couple of years. Not only will they not eat vegetables, many of them will not eat fruit, meat that is not breaded and/or fried, bread that is not white, and milk that is not flavored. I have even seen a good proportion of children that will not touch macaroni and cheese when they first arrive on my doorstep. People, this is getting out of hand.
Our Family Pact
Unlike my peers, I was more adamant about my children eating their vegetables than even my parents. When I first married my husband, he was the pickiest eater I had ever met. I had a great deal of nutrition training in high school thanks to a very good home economics teacher, and I knew the consequences of bad eating habits. Therefore, when we had children we made a pact to eat some of everything on the table whether we liked it or not because my husband understood what his eating habits had already done to his health. He also understood that he would have to model better eating habits or his children would end up with the same issues he already had in his 20s. It was tough for him to learn to eat better as an adult. I did not make it very easy for him either. I fixed 3 different vegetables with every meal. He learned to eat even spinach and beets without too much of a fuss as long as I only fixed those occasionally. When we married, his idea of a vegetable was mashed potatoes. He would not even eat yellow corn only white. Basically, he only ate foods that were brown and white. Does that sound familiar?
Today's Picky Eaters
Of course, now I have been exposed to children that make my husband look like the healthiest eater in the world. They will not eat mashed potatoes. They fuss if the chicken nuggets are baked instead of fried. If you hand them white milk, they just might throw it at you. The hostility over the food has also increased exponentially. Many parents have completely given up (or never even tried) on getting their children to eat much beyond chicken nuggets and french fries. I had one kid that would only eat pop tarts and drink apple juice. Many parents complicate this by fixing a separate meal for their children. Every member of the family gets to choose from a variety of frozen meals for supper. Meals are not planned. Many children in today's society are not even exposed to vegetables and sometimes fruits before they arrive on the doorstep of childcares and schools.
What's the Big Deal?
The title of this post is "What is the Big Deal?" Many people ask that very question when the subject of picky eating comes up. There was a show several years back that answered that question in a very graphic way at times. It was called "Honey We Are Killing Our Kids." In this show the producers would take a computer simulation and factor in a child's present eating habits to show the parents what the long-term effects of the vitamin and mineral deficiencies would do to their children. It also factored in the amount of exercise, but the descriptions of the long-term effects of bad eating habits stunned most parents. Of course, this show was cancelled because American people do not want to hear about the effects of their children's eating habits. However, I wish this was required for all preschool parents. People, it is a big deal. When your children go years without eating anything resembling a vegetable or a fruit, it has consequences. It affects the tone, color, and clearness of their skin. It affects the luster of their hair. One of the most shocking parts of the simulation for parents was the hair loss that ensued because of vitamin deficiencies even for girls. Of course, it affects their weight. Any nutritionist worth anything will tell you that a weight loss plan that does not include a lot of vegetables will not result in long-term weight loss. Period. The past generations had a reason for making their children eat their vegetables. They understood that a person cannot be truly healthy without them. We as a society will have to very soon come to terms with this reality or be crushed by medical expenses and other bad consequences.
I hope you have enjoyed this post. Goodbye and God bless!! Check out Natalie's children's books at: https://www.amazon.com/author/nataliewade7457
Saturday, May 10, 2014
The Unstructured Learning Style
This post will look at the unstructured learning style as opposed to the structured learning style. I have to admit that this is one of the learning styles that is least in my own personal repertoire, but I completely understand one of the most important aspects of this style - teachable moments. Of course, as with all of these learning styles, you should never rely on one style exclusively. I hope I can give you some positive information to glean from this learning style that will be helpful in your learning environment.
What is Unstructured Learning?
This style basically encompasses the philosophy of many early childhood experts. It involves what is often referred to as "child-centered instruction." Instead of being teacher-directed, this style gives children the lead. Adults just simply follow the cues given by the children. In this style children are given free rein to structure their day. In its purest form, children even eat and sleep on their own schedule. Children drift through activities prepared by an adult beforehand, but the adult acts more as facilitator than teacher. As the children move through the various activities, the adults look for teachable moments to expand on the concepts in which a child already has an interest.
The Purest Form of This Style
To say that I have issue with this style in its purest form would be the understatement of the century. As a former homeschooling mom, I have seen this style implemented in its purest form within the homeschooling community with absolutely disastrous results. There is a reason children are put under the protection and authority of adults. Children will not always (seldom ever) choose what they need. It is the adult's job to make sure a child learns all the necessary information required to function in the adult world. That should be a given. However, in our current society so ruled by relativism it is shameful, to make children learn a set core of knowledge nearly constitutes child abuse. This is ludicrous. Many might ask what is wrong with being child centered? In return, I ask them. If left to their own devices will children take regular naps? eat their vegetables? stick with a difficult concept until they conquer it? do anything they find unpleasant no matter how important that something might be? The answer to most of those questions is a resounding NO!! In truth even the early childhood experts understand this concept. That is why they have a totally different tone for care requirements than they have for instruction requirements. They expect you to somehow teach the children to wash their hands a million times a day, eat right, understand that they need rest, get along with their peers, and put away all their toys in the right place, but do it in such a way that they feel like they have chosen these things on their own. Academic concepts will magically develop from a child's free play as they explore their world on their own terms. Nothing such be coerced or forced. Children should float along in their happy little world and never feel stress of any kind. I hope that sounds as ridiculous as I meant it to sound. However, I have read those books, and for those that truly adhere to the theory of relativism, this represents their philosophy entirely.
Underlying Philosophies
One of my great frustrations involves how little people in today's society think about the underlying philosophies of what is considered "best practice" these days. In truth, when presented with philosophies such as relativism in their unadulterated form, most people would not agree with those philosophies. Yet, when those same philosophies are presented under the guise of the latest research, people accept them hook, line, and sinker. I guess many people do not understand the difference between scientific research and research done in the humanities. Scientific research usually (but not always) involves concepts and ideas that can be represented in the real world. In other words, the results can be observed and measured. In the humanities, which is basically everything that deals with human relationships and existence, research involves theories and hypothesis that cannot necessarily be observed and measured. In the humanities all research flows from the underlying philosophy of the ones doing the research. This bias cannot be completely removed no matter how careful the researchers try to be. Therefore, all research in the humanities must be judged by its underlying philosophy.
The Philosophy of Relativism
Just in case, you have no real idea what the philosophy of relativism involves, let me enlighten you. People that adhere to this philosophy do not believe in a set right and wrong. All things are different shades of gray. There is no God and no absolute standard for any moral dictates. Laws flow from the will of the people and can and should be changed as the will of the people changes as long as those people adhere to the relativistic philosophy. People that do believe in a set right and wrong represent threats to a stable society because they impose standards not necessarily accepted by some people. If you follow this train of thought out to its logical conclusion, this philosophy basically says that all people should be able to do what is right in their own eyes. For that I ask the question. Should child molesters be able to do what is right in their eyes? How about thieves? Or gang members? I hope you understand that the philosophy of relativism only applies when it suits the people that hold that philosophy. If you fall outside what they consider normal, you are wrong, and they are right. Therefore, there really is a right and wrong. They just get to decide what that is, not God.
Teachable Moments
Even though I have serious problems with this style of instruction in its purest form, some points raised by those that claim this as the way to teach children can be very useful. One of those involves teachable moments. Using teachable moments when a child's interest is peaked, can be a very useful tool. Many turning point moments for children do involve these teachable moments. However, all the other moments of just plain ordinary instruction are just as important and useful. The plain ordinary day-to-day instruction does not have the flair of the teachable moments, but that does not make it unnecessary. Many times the plain and boring can be more necessary to bring a child to the point of being able to use the teachable moment. That "aha" moment had lots of foundational instruction behind it, or it would not have happened. The degree to which teachers use these teachable moments varies from individual to individual. Some people can be very intuitive about these teachable moments and others only catch the big ones. This has everything to do with a person's personal teaching repertoire and does not necessarily make one teacher better than another teacher. It just makes them different. Remember children exist that need all types of teachers. We need to be about the business of matching children with teachers that fit their personal learning repertoire not trying to make everyone fit into a one-size-fits-all system. That includes the unstructured style as well as all the other styles. I really wish we could eliminate all the QRS systems that are solely based on the unstructured style as well as the other side that is solely based on the structured style. Both are wrong.
Free-Play
Another good point brought out by the child-centered camp involves free play for children. Even though I do not agree that this is the only way children learn, free play represents a huge portion of how children process information. How children initially acquire information varies widely from child to child. However, children use free play to process that information. They practice what they learn and expand on it through play. They discover subtleties and variations of what they have learned. They experiment and sometimes outright discover new things through play. All of this represents the benefits of free play. We must fight to restore free play for children in today's society. It is on the verge of becoming extinct for various and assorted reasons.
I hope you have enjoyed this post. Goodbye and God bless!! Check out Natalie's children's books at: https://www.amazon.com/author/nataliewade7457
What is Unstructured Learning?
This style basically encompasses the philosophy of many early childhood experts. It involves what is often referred to as "child-centered instruction." Instead of being teacher-directed, this style gives children the lead. Adults just simply follow the cues given by the children. In this style children are given free rein to structure their day. In its purest form, children even eat and sleep on their own schedule. Children drift through activities prepared by an adult beforehand, but the adult acts more as facilitator than teacher. As the children move through the various activities, the adults look for teachable moments to expand on the concepts in which a child already has an interest.
The Purest Form of This Style
To say that I have issue with this style in its purest form would be the understatement of the century. As a former homeschooling mom, I have seen this style implemented in its purest form within the homeschooling community with absolutely disastrous results. There is a reason children are put under the protection and authority of adults. Children will not always (seldom ever) choose what they need. It is the adult's job to make sure a child learns all the necessary information required to function in the adult world. That should be a given. However, in our current society so ruled by relativism it is shameful, to make children learn a set core of knowledge nearly constitutes child abuse. This is ludicrous. Many might ask what is wrong with being child centered? In return, I ask them. If left to their own devices will children take regular naps? eat their vegetables? stick with a difficult concept until they conquer it? do anything they find unpleasant no matter how important that something might be? The answer to most of those questions is a resounding NO!! In truth even the early childhood experts understand this concept. That is why they have a totally different tone for care requirements than they have for instruction requirements. They expect you to somehow teach the children to wash their hands a million times a day, eat right, understand that they need rest, get along with their peers, and put away all their toys in the right place, but do it in such a way that they feel like they have chosen these things on their own. Academic concepts will magically develop from a child's free play as they explore their world on their own terms. Nothing such be coerced or forced. Children should float along in their happy little world and never feel stress of any kind. I hope that sounds as ridiculous as I meant it to sound. However, I have read those books, and for those that truly adhere to the theory of relativism, this represents their philosophy entirely.
Underlying Philosophies
One of my great frustrations involves how little people in today's society think about the underlying philosophies of what is considered "best practice" these days. In truth, when presented with philosophies such as relativism in their unadulterated form, most people would not agree with those philosophies. Yet, when those same philosophies are presented under the guise of the latest research, people accept them hook, line, and sinker. I guess many people do not understand the difference between scientific research and research done in the humanities. Scientific research usually (but not always) involves concepts and ideas that can be represented in the real world. In other words, the results can be observed and measured. In the humanities, which is basically everything that deals with human relationships and existence, research involves theories and hypothesis that cannot necessarily be observed and measured. In the humanities all research flows from the underlying philosophy of the ones doing the research. This bias cannot be completely removed no matter how careful the researchers try to be. Therefore, all research in the humanities must be judged by its underlying philosophy.
The Philosophy of Relativism
Just in case, you have no real idea what the philosophy of relativism involves, let me enlighten you. People that adhere to this philosophy do not believe in a set right and wrong. All things are different shades of gray. There is no God and no absolute standard for any moral dictates. Laws flow from the will of the people and can and should be changed as the will of the people changes as long as those people adhere to the relativistic philosophy. People that do believe in a set right and wrong represent threats to a stable society because they impose standards not necessarily accepted by some people. If you follow this train of thought out to its logical conclusion, this philosophy basically says that all people should be able to do what is right in their own eyes. For that I ask the question. Should child molesters be able to do what is right in their eyes? How about thieves? Or gang members? I hope you understand that the philosophy of relativism only applies when it suits the people that hold that philosophy. If you fall outside what they consider normal, you are wrong, and they are right. Therefore, there really is a right and wrong. They just get to decide what that is, not God.
Teachable Moments
Even though I have serious problems with this style of instruction in its purest form, some points raised by those that claim this as the way to teach children can be very useful. One of those involves teachable moments. Using teachable moments when a child's interest is peaked, can be a very useful tool. Many turning point moments for children do involve these teachable moments. However, all the other moments of just plain ordinary instruction are just as important and useful. The plain ordinary day-to-day instruction does not have the flair of the teachable moments, but that does not make it unnecessary. Many times the plain and boring can be more necessary to bring a child to the point of being able to use the teachable moment. That "aha" moment had lots of foundational instruction behind it, or it would not have happened. The degree to which teachers use these teachable moments varies from individual to individual. Some people can be very intuitive about these teachable moments and others only catch the big ones. This has everything to do with a person's personal teaching repertoire and does not necessarily make one teacher better than another teacher. It just makes them different. Remember children exist that need all types of teachers. We need to be about the business of matching children with teachers that fit their personal learning repertoire not trying to make everyone fit into a one-size-fits-all system. That includes the unstructured style as well as all the other styles. I really wish we could eliminate all the QRS systems that are solely based on the unstructured style as well as the other side that is solely based on the structured style. Both are wrong.
Free-Play
Another good point brought out by the child-centered camp involves free play for children. Even though I do not agree that this is the only way children learn, free play represents a huge portion of how children process information. How children initially acquire information varies widely from child to child. However, children use free play to process that information. They practice what they learn and expand on it through play. They discover subtleties and variations of what they have learned. They experiment and sometimes outright discover new things through play. All of this represents the benefits of free play. We must fight to restore free play for children in today's society. It is on the verge of becoming extinct for various and assorted reasons.
I hope you have enjoyed this post. Goodbye and God bless!! Check out Natalie's children's books at: https://www.amazon.com/author/nataliewade7457
Thursday, May 8, 2014
Dealing with Overstimulated Children
This post will look at the very real problem of children that have become overstimulated. In our fast-paced world this happens much more than I think we even realize. We have become so accustomed to overstimulated children that we think this is normal. However, overstimulation has physical, emotional, and developmental consequences. I will look at the root causes of overstimulation and steps that can be taken to avoid this state of being for our children.
What is Overstimulation
Overstimulation can be defined as a continued state of adrenaline rush. Children are hyper and wild. We often refer to this as "bouncing off the walls." Many would have us believe that this is normal for toddlers and preschoolers. However, research is beginning to bare out that this constant state of adrenaline can be detrimental to a child's health. We as human beings were not designed to live in a constant state of adrenaline rush. This can have close to the same effect on a child as toxic stress, which has been shown to have devastating effects on a child's long-term health, physically, emotionally, and developmentally. In the early childhood world, we have become obsessed with making sure a child does not experience toxic stress, and yet we do absolutely nothing about overstimulation except call it developmentally appropriate. This is absurd.
What Causes Overstimulation?
Some overstimulation is caused by a chemical imbalance in a child's brain that hinders a child from shifting into a lower gear. However, this is not very common and some children that are labeled ADD and ADHD do not have this chemical imbalance. Most overstimulation is caused by two different factors either singularly or together in some combination. Those two factors are poor sleeping habits and poor eating habits. In most of today's children, both factors come into play.
Before I tackle sleeping and eating habits, let me say that the children that do have the true chemical imbalance will benefit from the steps needed to reduce normal overstimulation. These children will just need extra steps to help them deal with too much stimuli. Therefore, reducing the factors that cause normal overstimulation may help parents and caregivers determine if a child truly shows signs of ADD and ADHD. Medicating a child that simply has normal overstimulation should not happen, but it does. Unfortunately, dealing with the two main causes of overstimulation represents a great deal of what our society does not have the will or desire to conquer.
Poor Sleeping Habits
The first and probably the biggest cause of overstimulation involves poor sleeping habits. I laugh out loud at people and parents that say their children under the age of five do not need naps. Almost in the same breath, these same parents will complain about how hyper and out of control their children can be. They will also complain about bedtime and wondering whether or not their preschool child will ever really sleep through the night. Upon further investigation, it becomes plain that what is really going on is that naps and regular bedtimes represents a fight the parents have completely lost and/or have convinced themselves is not really necessary. I understand. Regular naps and bedtimes require an adult to be consistent. My generation and all the generations behind us were not raised to be consistent. If we acquire consistency, it is usually in adulthood out of complete necessity during a very hard time of life. However, many early childhood experts complicate this scenario with an overemphasis on keeping a child's life stress-free. They tell parents that the stress of the battle over naps is worse for them than the lack of rest. This makes me angry because it is so wrong it is shameful. A certain amount of stress has been shown to be good for children. Otherwise, they never learn to deal with difficult circumstances. If you needed to pick a situation in which to apply good stress, the battle over naps and bedtimes would be an excellent place to start.
Let me be completely clear. Children need rest. Naps are absolutely necessary for a child's well-being and proper growth on all fronts. Unless you have experienced the enormous difference between the same child properly rested and not rested, it may be difficult to understand just how important this is for the child. Most American children do not get the proper rest, and therefore, American parents have no point of reference. That is, until they arrive on my doorstep. At my childcare, nap has never been optional. If a parent presses that point, I will tell them my childcare is not a good fit for their family and show them the door. By some miracle as a young parent, I received good information on the importance of sleep for a child. In my household, nap was never an option and bedtimes were mostly consistent. When they were not, my children climbed the walls. It did not take a rocket scientist to figure out what made my children climb the walls. Did my peers give me a hard time about being so adamant about naps and bedtimes? Absolutely, but I was a stay-at-home mom. I had to live with my children 24/7. I was not interested in living with overstimulated children unless I had no choice in the matter. I brought that knowledge with me when I started a childcare. Over and over and over I have proven to parents the difference regular naps make in their children. It even helps them sleep better at night. After children have been here for over 6 months, my parents will start commenting on how much calmer their child has become. Even then some parents still do not connect the dots and will not enforce a regular bedtime and naps. That makes for very unpleasant Mondays after children have been overstimulated all weekend.
Terrible Eaing Habits
The second underlying cause for overstimulation involves the very bane of our society - terrible eating habits. Here is yet one more reason that children should eat their fruits and vegetables. Tackling this problem will actually be the subject of the next several midweek posts. However, let me say that if parents and caregivers truly understood what bad eating habits do to children in the short term and the long term, we would not have an obesity epidemic. Unfortunately, food tends to be a very personal and hotly passionate subject. We like what we like, and we do not want to be told otherwise. The stress-free philosophy also comes into play in this one as well. I hope after the next several posts you will realize that the battle over the fruits and vegetables just might be the most important battle in which a parent and/or caregiver chooses to engage. It really does make that big a difference.
I hope you have enjoyed this post. Goodbye and God bless!! Check out Natalie's children's books at: https://www.amazon.com/author/nataliewade7457
What is Overstimulation
Overstimulation can be defined as a continued state of adrenaline rush. Children are hyper and wild. We often refer to this as "bouncing off the walls." Many would have us believe that this is normal for toddlers and preschoolers. However, research is beginning to bare out that this constant state of adrenaline can be detrimental to a child's health. We as human beings were not designed to live in a constant state of adrenaline rush. This can have close to the same effect on a child as toxic stress, which has been shown to have devastating effects on a child's long-term health, physically, emotionally, and developmentally. In the early childhood world, we have become obsessed with making sure a child does not experience toxic stress, and yet we do absolutely nothing about overstimulation except call it developmentally appropriate. This is absurd.
What Causes Overstimulation?
Some overstimulation is caused by a chemical imbalance in a child's brain that hinders a child from shifting into a lower gear. However, this is not very common and some children that are labeled ADD and ADHD do not have this chemical imbalance. Most overstimulation is caused by two different factors either singularly or together in some combination. Those two factors are poor sleeping habits and poor eating habits. In most of today's children, both factors come into play.
Before I tackle sleeping and eating habits, let me say that the children that do have the true chemical imbalance will benefit from the steps needed to reduce normal overstimulation. These children will just need extra steps to help them deal with too much stimuli. Therefore, reducing the factors that cause normal overstimulation may help parents and caregivers determine if a child truly shows signs of ADD and ADHD. Medicating a child that simply has normal overstimulation should not happen, but it does. Unfortunately, dealing with the two main causes of overstimulation represents a great deal of what our society does not have the will or desire to conquer.
Poor Sleeping Habits
The first and probably the biggest cause of overstimulation involves poor sleeping habits. I laugh out loud at people and parents that say their children under the age of five do not need naps. Almost in the same breath, these same parents will complain about how hyper and out of control their children can be. They will also complain about bedtime and wondering whether or not their preschool child will ever really sleep through the night. Upon further investigation, it becomes plain that what is really going on is that naps and regular bedtimes represents a fight the parents have completely lost and/or have convinced themselves is not really necessary. I understand. Regular naps and bedtimes require an adult to be consistent. My generation and all the generations behind us were not raised to be consistent. If we acquire consistency, it is usually in adulthood out of complete necessity during a very hard time of life. However, many early childhood experts complicate this scenario with an overemphasis on keeping a child's life stress-free. They tell parents that the stress of the battle over naps is worse for them than the lack of rest. This makes me angry because it is so wrong it is shameful. A certain amount of stress has been shown to be good for children. Otherwise, they never learn to deal with difficult circumstances. If you needed to pick a situation in which to apply good stress, the battle over naps and bedtimes would be an excellent place to start.
Let me be completely clear. Children need rest. Naps are absolutely necessary for a child's well-being and proper growth on all fronts. Unless you have experienced the enormous difference between the same child properly rested and not rested, it may be difficult to understand just how important this is for the child. Most American children do not get the proper rest, and therefore, American parents have no point of reference. That is, until they arrive on my doorstep. At my childcare, nap has never been optional. If a parent presses that point, I will tell them my childcare is not a good fit for their family and show them the door. By some miracle as a young parent, I received good information on the importance of sleep for a child. In my household, nap was never an option and bedtimes were mostly consistent. When they were not, my children climbed the walls. It did not take a rocket scientist to figure out what made my children climb the walls. Did my peers give me a hard time about being so adamant about naps and bedtimes? Absolutely, but I was a stay-at-home mom. I had to live with my children 24/7. I was not interested in living with overstimulated children unless I had no choice in the matter. I brought that knowledge with me when I started a childcare. Over and over and over I have proven to parents the difference regular naps make in their children. It even helps them sleep better at night. After children have been here for over 6 months, my parents will start commenting on how much calmer their child has become. Even then some parents still do not connect the dots and will not enforce a regular bedtime and naps. That makes for very unpleasant Mondays after children have been overstimulated all weekend.
Terrible Eaing Habits
The second underlying cause for overstimulation involves the very bane of our society - terrible eating habits. Here is yet one more reason that children should eat their fruits and vegetables. Tackling this problem will actually be the subject of the next several midweek posts. However, let me say that if parents and caregivers truly understood what bad eating habits do to children in the short term and the long term, we would not have an obesity epidemic. Unfortunately, food tends to be a very personal and hotly passionate subject. We like what we like, and we do not want to be told otherwise. The stress-free philosophy also comes into play in this one as well. I hope after the next several posts you will realize that the battle over the fruits and vegetables just might be the most important battle in which a parent and/or caregiver chooses to engage. It really does make that big a difference.
I hope you have enjoyed this post. Goodbye and God bless!! Check out Natalie's children's books at: https://www.amazon.com/author/nataliewade7457
Sunday, May 4, 2014
The Passive Learning Style
This post will deal with a learning style that among some circles is considered obsolete. Many early childhood experts and educational experts believe that today's children will not learn in a passive environment with early childhood experts being the most adamant. Learning to sit still and pay attention has become developmentally inappropriate expectations for preschoolers. While I agree that expecting preschoolers to sit still for long periods of time is developmentally inappropriate, learning to sit still and pay attention for short periods of time is essential for that child's long-term academic success.
What Is the Passive Learning Style?
First, let us discuss what constitutes the passive learning style. This style represents the way most of us learned in school for the past 6 centuries. Children are expected to be able to pay attention and listen to an adult present information. Then those children apply that information in graduated exercises designed to build competency over time. This approach also relies heavily on drill and practice exercises. As opposed to the active learning style, children must sit still, listen, and work on their own. For all of recorded history up until the last 50 years or so, this approach represented the way academic subjects were presented. Trades and other skills, which relied on the master/apprentice relationship, used the active learning style rather than the passive learning style. I do believe our ancestors had a grasp on how to present information that has been lost in the last century. However, the division of the styles hits on politically charged areas. Long ago, not all people were required to learn academic subjects. Some children were apprenticed to a master to learn a trade rather than expected to sit still and learn academic content. This did lead to a system of haves and have nots. Therefore, today everyone is required to learn academic content. Yet, we run into children that have an extremely hard time grasping this content. I do not think we will ever return to the two-tier system of centuries ago, but I do believe we are going to have to relent to the notion that it takes all kinds of people to run a society. Some people will be happier doing physical labor that does not require a great deal of academic thought, but can still be greatly skilled workers in their area of expertise. We need to have more options and paths at the high school level that will prepare those children that have a bent toward skilled labor to be able to do work that will be satisfying.
Both Types of Smart
At this point, you may be asking yourself if I am saying that academic content requires a passive learning style and skilled content requires an active learning style? As politically incorrect as that notion is today, that is exactly what I am saying. The fact remains that children that have the ability to sit still and pay attention will always exceed those that cannot on academic content. I am not saying those children are not smart. They just may not be book smart. We need people in a society that can do jobs that require great levels of skill but not necessarily be able to diagram a sentence. We also need people that can handle technical details but could not change a spark plug on a car if their life depended on it. Both types of smart are necessary. One type of smart does not negate the need for the other type of smart. Will one type of smart always make more money? Probably, but there is a huge difference between rich in money and rich in life sometimes. Many people think the other side has it better until they experience the level of stress that comes with the other side. I believe God creates us all with a purpose and a plan, and He equips us to handle the type of stress that comes with His plan for our life. We may not be able to handle the type of stress that comes from a lifestyle outside of His will. I could not be a car mechanic if my life depended on it. However, many mechanics would have a nervous breakdown trying to deal with the technical issues involved in writing for a living. We need to help all children find their path and do everything in our power to prepare them to fulfill that path.
Should Every Child Learn to Be Passive?
How does all of this relate to the early childhood world? Should we be actively trying to prepare children for the passive learning style? The answer to that question is yes and no. By the time children are three and four years old, they are already showing us very strong clues as to what their learning repertoire will be. For those children that can sit still and pay attention we need to prepare them for the rigors of the academic world. For those children that can somewhat sit still and pay attention, we need to help them develop that and begin to look for the strengths these children will already be showing. We might not be able to change the way the school systems function, but we can plant seeds in the hearts and minds of both the children and the parents as to the path this particular child might take. That little seed can truly change the course of that child's life. For those children that absolutely cannot sit still and pay attention, we will need to switch to more active learning activities. I will say that covering academic content for wigglers is much easier in a one-on-one setting than it is in a group setting. Over the years I have been able to help children reach academic goals thanks to my one-on-one structure that would not have been possible in a typically structured classroom. They had issues sitting still in preschool in group settings, but still managed to excel the average in acquiring academic concepts. These children really need schools with very small classrooms or a homeschooling situation. However, they might still have a bent toward a more skilled career than an academic one. They may be farmers instead of doctors or contractors and mechanics instead of lawyers.
Basic Academics
However, in our society a certain level of academic skill is required to function. Teaching academic concepts especially the more technical aspects in an active learning way in reality constitutes the long way around the mountain. There is no way around this and explains a great deal of the frustration of American teachers when trying to reach certain academic goals for all children on a certain timetable. It simply takes longer to teach certain children technical academic content that truly requires the passive learning style. This includes reading and a great deal of math. These children can reach these goals, but they need a different timetable and may not reach the same level of fluency that the passive learners can acquire. We do both types of learners a great disservice by not realizing this difference. We hold back the passive learners to give the active learners the extra time they need to become fluent. We end up pushing the active learners to frustration because we end up having to employ many passive learning techniques to truly reach the level of competency we expect of all children. This is especially true the higher the grade level and the more technical the information. Until we begin to more individualize education, we will always have this issue. This is why homeschoolers on average excel when compared to their public school counterparts. The passive learners can proceed at the pace they were designed to handle and reach higher levels of competency than their public school peers. (Ever wonder why so many homeschoolers win the spelling bees? This is why.) The active learners are free to pursue the path they were designed to follow and arrive at adulthood ready to go. Can you say that about their public school counterparts? Not really. Until we take the political correctness out of the debate, our public school systems will always flounder. We will never be a one-size-fits-all society. We are just too diverse. We need to embrace that instead of fighting it, and proceed accordingly.
I hope you have enjoyed this post. Goodbye and God bless!! Check out Natalie's children's books at: https://www.amazon.com/author/nataliewade7457
What Is the Passive Learning Style?
First, let us discuss what constitutes the passive learning style. This style represents the way most of us learned in school for the past 6 centuries. Children are expected to be able to pay attention and listen to an adult present information. Then those children apply that information in graduated exercises designed to build competency over time. This approach also relies heavily on drill and practice exercises. As opposed to the active learning style, children must sit still, listen, and work on their own. For all of recorded history up until the last 50 years or so, this approach represented the way academic subjects were presented. Trades and other skills, which relied on the master/apprentice relationship, used the active learning style rather than the passive learning style. I do believe our ancestors had a grasp on how to present information that has been lost in the last century. However, the division of the styles hits on politically charged areas. Long ago, not all people were required to learn academic subjects. Some children were apprenticed to a master to learn a trade rather than expected to sit still and learn academic content. This did lead to a system of haves and have nots. Therefore, today everyone is required to learn academic content. Yet, we run into children that have an extremely hard time grasping this content. I do not think we will ever return to the two-tier system of centuries ago, but I do believe we are going to have to relent to the notion that it takes all kinds of people to run a society. Some people will be happier doing physical labor that does not require a great deal of academic thought, but can still be greatly skilled workers in their area of expertise. We need to have more options and paths at the high school level that will prepare those children that have a bent toward skilled labor to be able to do work that will be satisfying.
Both Types of Smart
At this point, you may be asking yourself if I am saying that academic content requires a passive learning style and skilled content requires an active learning style? As politically incorrect as that notion is today, that is exactly what I am saying. The fact remains that children that have the ability to sit still and pay attention will always exceed those that cannot on academic content. I am not saying those children are not smart. They just may not be book smart. We need people in a society that can do jobs that require great levels of skill but not necessarily be able to diagram a sentence. We also need people that can handle technical details but could not change a spark plug on a car if their life depended on it. Both types of smart are necessary. One type of smart does not negate the need for the other type of smart. Will one type of smart always make more money? Probably, but there is a huge difference between rich in money and rich in life sometimes. Many people think the other side has it better until they experience the level of stress that comes with the other side. I believe God creates us all with a purpose and a plan, and He equips us to handle the type of stress that comes with His plan for our life. We may not be able to handle the type of stress that comes from a lifestyle outside of His will. I could not be a car mechanic if my life depended on it. However, many mechanics would have a nervous breakdown trying to deal with the technical issues involved in writing for a living. We need to help all children find their path and do everything in our power to prepare them to fulfill that path.
Should Every Child Learn to Be Passive?
How does all of this relate to the early childhood world? Should we be actively trying to prepare children for the passive learning style? The answer to that question is yes and no. By the time children are three and four years old, they are already showing us very strong clues as to what their learning repertoire will be. For those children that can sit still and pay attention we need to prepare them for the rigors of the academic world. For those children that can somewhat sit still and pay attention, we need to help them develop that and begin to look for the strengths these children will already be showing. We might not be able to change the way the school systems function, but we can plant seeds in the hearts and minds of both the children and the parents as to the path this particular child might take. That little seed can truly change the course of that child's life. For those children that absolutely cannot sit still and pay attention, we will need to switch to more active learning activities. I will say that covering academic content for wigglers is much easier in a one-on-one setting than it is in a group setting. Over the years I have been able to help children reach academic goals thanks to my one-on-one structure that would not have been possible in a typically structured classroom. They had issues sitting still in preschool in group settings, but still managed to excel the average in acquiring academic concepts. These children really need schools with very small classrooms or a homeschooling situation. However, they might still have a bent toward a more skilled career than an academic one. They may be farmers instead of doctors or contractors and mechanics instead of lawyers.
Basic Academics
However, in our society a certain level of academic skill is required to function. Teaching academic concepts especially the more technical aspects in an active learning way in reality constitutes the long way around the mountain. There is no way around this and explains a great deal of the frustration of American teachers when trying to reach certain academic goals for all children on a certain timetable. It simply takes longer to teach certain children technical academic content that truly requires the passive learning style. This includes reading and a great deal of math. These children can reach these goals, but they need a different timetable and may not reach the same level of fluency that the passive learners can acquire. We do both types of learners a great disservice by not realizing this difference. We hold back the passive learners to give the active learners the extra time they need to become fluent. We end up pushing the active learners to frustration because we end up having to employ many passive learning techniques to truly reach the level of competency we expect of all children. This is especially true the higher the grade level and the more technical the information. Until we begin to more individualize education, we will always have this issue. This is why homeschoolers on average excel when compared to their public school counterparts. The passive learners can proceed at the pace they were designed to handle and reach higher levels of competency than their public school peers. (Ever wonder why so many homeschoolers win the spelling bees? This is why.) The active learners are free to pursue the path they were designed to follow and arrive at adulthood ready to go. Can you say that about their public school counterparts? Not really. Until we take the political correctness out of the debate, our public school systems will always flounder. We will never be a one-size-fits-all society. We are just too diverse. We need to embrace that instead of fighting it, and proceed accordingly.
I hope you have enjoyed this post. Goodbye and God bless!! Check out Natalie's children's books at: https://www.amazon.com/author/nataliewade7457
Wednesday, April 30, 2014
Dealing with Mouth Issues - Verbal Abuse
This post is not going to deal with verbal abuse of children by adults. It is going to look at the very real issue of verbal abuse of adults and other children by children. It is a sad commentary on our society that this even has to be discussed. However, I have been the victim of some of the most vicious verbal blasting at the hand of a four year old.
Before we take off on this subject, I want to clarify a few things. I went to high school in the 1980s and suffered greatly at the hands of my peers as a geek. They were vicious. However, I have been verbally blasted as an adult by children far worse than anything I suffered as a teenager. The difference is the magnitude of the viciousness.
The Level of Viciousness
These days nothing is off limits and children as young as four learn this far too well. When these children reach the teenage years, it turns into cyberbullying. If you have never been the victim of cyberbullying consider yourself extremely lucky, and never cross anyone under the age of 30 to keep it that way. I really do not think until you have experienced firsthand what it is like to have someone post horrible things about you that are twisted half-truths, you cannot fully understand why so many teenagers struggle so hard with it. I understand. I have had the misfortune of crossing a couple of people under the age of 30 and had them take to social media and gossip websites and completely destroy my reputation and good name. You see, once something like that is out in the public arena, it is hard to dispel it no matter how twisted and wrong it is. These people must take lessons from the liberal spin doctors who deal in politics because they take your best points and reform them through outright lies and twisted half-truths to turn your good into something horrible. After all this happened, I truly sympathized with Clarence Thomas. He was once asked how it felt to be made a Supreme Court Justice in spite of the vicious attacks launched against him during his confirmation hearings. Instead of talking about beating his foes and making it to the Supreme Court, he lamented the loss of his good reputation and his good name. He said that he will never be able to get those back to the degree he had them before all the attacks, and he is right. Now imagine suffering something like this just because you made another person angry, and you are beginning to understand the world our children are growing up in today.
The Dirty Laundry Culture
How in the world did we get here? I believe there are two underlying causes for this. Number one, we have a dirty laundry culture. Since the days of Watergate, we have been a culture that flaunts people's dirty laundry. The song by Don Henley could not be a truer representation of our culture if it tried. We jump to the worst conclusion about people in the blink of an eye. No one ever gets the benefit of the doubt anymore. I feel so sorry for people that have to deal with public scandal. It is bad enough that you have your world falling apart around you, but then you have people flaunting your demise for the world to see. Do our children pick up on this? You bet. They learn early to jump to the worst conclusions about people. They learn that words can be a powerful weapon, and we give them plenty of modeling of how to destroy people with words. We model some pretty awful stuff without even thinking about how this is going to come back to bite us one day.
The Ugly Side of Free Expression
The second underlying cause comes from the early childhood experts. Since the late 1980s we have taught children that they can express themselves any way they feel without real consequences. This was started to help children that suffer abuse to feel okay to tell people about what was happening. As with everything else, they took it way too far and now children feel like they should be able to say whatever they want to say without any consequences whatsoever. This goes so far beyond just saying bad words. The worst verbal scalding I ever received from a child did not contain one cuss word, but that child used the technique of twisting half-truths to make me feel like the most useless creature on this planet. When a child looks you straight in the eye and tells you that "you are the worst teacher ever and I am going to tell my mom that you don't do anything all day but sit." For a person that takes great pride in her teaching abilities, but has to sit a lot because of health issues, this is hitting below the belt. Then this child continued to talk about how lazy I was until she had me in tears. Unfortunately I was not the only victim of this particular child. She went after her fellow classmates with the same viciousness. Fortunately one day, her mother caught her in the act and was completely horrified at what her daughter just said to another child. I would love to say that being caught by her mom cured her. It did not. She only became sneakier about her viciousness. I pray that one learns some good life lessons before she hits the teenage years or I will feel sorry for everyone in her path.
Modeling Civility
How do we fix this? To be honest, until we become a more civil society, I do not think we can fix this. We can preach all day long about how wrong it is to bully people, and then undo it all by talking about the latest scandal in front of the children. Our society takes way too much pride in its snarkiness. We are talking out of both sides of our mouth on this issue most of the time. We must treat people, ALL people with civility and respect. This means even the poor soul dealing with a public scandal because he/she said something stupid and the politician that we despise. In our centers we must have an environment of respect for each other, but this does not mean respecting a child's right to say whatever he/she pleases. That is not respect for other people. We must model civility and teach children how to have tact.
The Dirty Little Secret
I brought up this subject because it is the dirty little secret that many people do not discuss. Maybe it is because the adults feel embarrassed to have been so degraded by a child. As adults we should have been able to find a way to prevent the child from verbally abusing us and the other children in our care. Many parents share this same guilt and shame. They feel like failures because they are verbally abused by their children, but really have no real means to stop it without fear of losing their children or going to jail. We do not dare air our own dirty laundry because we have seen others do so to their own demise. We sugarcoat it and pray that by some means our children will learn better and become functioning adults. From my heart, I want to say to those providers and parents that you cannot stop a child from learning your weaknesses and vulnerabilities. Children have been doing that from the dawn of time. What has changed is our society's tolerance for discipline. Many children feel like they have every right to use that knowledge against you as the adult every time it suits their purpose. Even though they may be tearing your heart out, somehow communicate to them that what they are doing is evil and mean to the core. You just might be saving the life of another child that is not as capable as you of dealing with the level of viciousness being thrown your direction. However, do not feel like a failure because a child used this type of manipulative tool against you. It probably means you have a tender heart and they viewed that as a weakness to be exploited.
I hope you have enjoyed this post. Goodbye and God bless!! Check out Natalie's children's books at: https://www.amazon.com/author/nataliewade7457
Before we take off on this subject, I want to clarify a few things. I went to high school in the 1980s and suffered greatly at the hands of my peers as a geek. They were vicious. However, I have been verbally blasted as an adult by children far worse than anything I suffered as a teenager. The difference is the magnitude of the viciousness.
The Level of Viciousness
These days nothing is off limits and children as young as four learn this far too well. When these children reach the teenage years, it turns into cyberbullying. If you have never been the victim of cyberbullying consider yourself extremely lucky, and never cross anyone under the age of 30 to keep it that way. I really do not think until you have experienced firsthand what it is like to have someone post horrible things about you that are twisted half-truths, you cannot fully understand why so many teenagers struggle so hard with it. I understand. I have had the misfortune of crossing a couple of people under the age of 30 and had them take to social media and gossip websites and completely destroy my reputation and good name. You see, once something like that is out in the public arena, it is hard to dispel it no matter how twisted and wrong it is. These people must take lessons from the liberal spin doctors who deal in politics because they take your best points and reform them through outright lies and twisted half-truths to turn your good into something horrible. After all this happened, I truly sympathized with Clarence Thomas. He was once asked how it felt to be made a Supreme Court Justice in spite of the vicious attacks launched against him during his confirmation hearings. Instead of talking about beating his foes and making it to the Supreme Court, he lamented the loss of his good reputation and his good name. He said that he will never be able to get those back to the degree he had them before all the attacks, and he is right. Now imagine suffering something like this just because you made another person angry, and you are beginning to understand the world our children are growing up in today.
The Dirty Laundry Culture
How in the world did we get here? I believe there are two underlying causes for this. Number one, we have a dirty laundry culture. Since the days of Watergate, we have been a culture that flaunts people's dirty laundry. The song by Don Henley could not be a truer representation of our culture if it tried. We jump to the worst conclusion about people in the blink of an eye. No one ever gets the benefit of the doubt anymore. I feel so sorry for people that have to deal with public scandal. It is bad enough that you have your world falling apart around you, but then you have people flaunting your demise for the world to see. Do our children pick up on this? You bet. They learn early to jump to the worst conclusions about people. They learn that words can be a powerful weapon, and we give them plenty of modeling of how to destroy people with words. We model some pretty awful stuff without even thinking about how this is going to come back to bite us one day.
The Ugly Side of Free Expression
The second underlying cause comes from the early childhood experts. Since the late 1980s we have taught children that they can express themselves any way they feel without real consequences. This was started to help children that suffer abuse to feel okay to tell people about what was happening. As with everything else, they took it way too far and now children feel like they should be able to say whatever they want to say without any consequences whatsoever. This goes so far beyond just saying bad words. The worst verbal scalding I ever received from a child did not contain one cuss word, but that child used the technique of twisting half-truths to make me feel like the most useless creature on this planet. When a child looks you straight in the eye and tells you that "you are the worst teacher ever and I am going to tell my mom that you don't do anything all day but sit." For a person that takes great pride in her teaching abilities, but has to sit a lot because of health issues, this is hitting below the belt. Then this child continued to talk about how lazy I was until she had me in tears. Unfortunately I was not the only victim of this particular child. She went after her fellow classmates with the same viciousness. Fortunately one day, her mother caught her in the act and was completely horrified at what her daughter just said to another child. I would love to say that being caught by her mom cured her. It did not. She only became sneakier about her viciousness. I pray that one learns some good life lessons before she hits the teenage years or I will feel sorry for everyone in her path.
Modeling Civility
How do we fix this? To be honest, until we become a more civil society, I do not think we can fix this. We can preach all day long about how wrong it is to bully people, and then undo it all by talking about the latest scandal in front of the children. Our society takes way too much pride in its snarkiness. We are talking out of both sides of our mouth on this issue most of the time. We must treat people, ALL people with civility and respect. This means even the poor soul dealing with a public scandal because he/she said something stupid and the politician that we despise. In our centers we must have an environment of respect for each other, but this does not mean respecting a child's right to say whatever he/she pleases. That is not respect for other people. We must model civility and teach children how to have tact.
The Dirty Little Secret
I brought up this subject because it is the dirty little secret that many people do not discuss. Maybe it is because the adults feel embarrassed to have been so degraded by a child. As adults we should have been able to find a way to prevent the child from verbally abusing us and the other children in our care. Many parents share this same guilt and shame. They feel like failures because they are verbally abused by their children, but really have no real means to stop it without fear of losing their children or going to jail. We do not dare air our own dirty laundry because we have seen others do so to their own demise. We sugarcoat it and pray that by some means our children will learn better and become functioning adults. From my heart, I want to say to those providers and parents that you cannot stop a child from learning your weaknesses and vulnerabilities. Children have been doing that from the dawn of time. What has changed is our society's tolerance for discipline. Many children feel like they have every right to use that knowledge against you as the adult every time it suits their purpose. Even though they may be tearing your heart out, somehow communicate to them that what they are doing is evil and mean to the core. You just might be saving the life of another child that is not as capable as you of dealing with the level of viciousness being thrown your direction. However, do not feel like a failure because a child used this type of manipulative tool against you. It probably means you have a tender heart and they viewed that as a weakness to be exploited.
I hope you have enjoyed this post. Goodbye and God bless!! Check out Natalie's children's books at: https://www.amazon.com/author/nataliewade7457
Saturday, April 26, 2014
The Structured Learning Style
This post will look at the structured learning style. Many would call this the old-fashioned way of teaching that is out of date and out of touch with today's children. However, on a daily basis I prove them wrong. This is my main style of teaching in a manner of speaking. I do put a twist on what you see in public schools, but the content and basic structure are practically the same.
What Is the Structured Learning Style?
Basically, it involves teacher-directed instruction. The instruction follows a predictable routine that varies little from day-to-day. In other words, the daily schedule is set and followed with only slight variations. The instruction follows a line by line format that allows the students to build precept on precept. Many would call this the most boring way to teach. However, for many children this type of system is comforting.
Structured Learning in a Childcare
What does structured learning look like in my childcare? Number one, I have a basic schedule that changes very little even from year to year. With family childcare a provider has the same children for multiple years not just one. When I initiate changes into my schedule, I will always do so gradually making small changes over the course of months until I reach the new goal. I have learned over the years that many small children have a very hard time with change. When they are allowed to settle into a routine, they will take great comfort in that "normalness" and fight all changes to their little world. Making change happen in very small increments helps them to accept the new "normal" over time. This is especially true of children with special needs and even children with ADD and ADHD even though that seems to be a paradox. You would think children with attention issues would hate structure and this type of schedule. However, even though they do hate it in the beginning, once they adjust, they will fight change more than any of the other children. Over the years it has amazed me how much this type of structure calms the most hyper of children. I will admit that some people find implementing this type of structure beyond what they can do. My mother absolutely hates having to implement change in small increments. It drives her nuts. She wants to institute the change and get on with it. I have also had many employees that were of the same mind. However, even my mother has now worked here long enough to understand that I am right, but she still hates it.
One-on-One Instruction
The second aspect of structured learning that I have implemented into my childcare revolves around the one-on-one instruction I provide every child every day. This is where my system deviates from public school classrooms and many other early childhood classrooms. I have a homeschool design to my childcare. Every child has individual planners that lay out his/her lessons in daily incremental steps. I use direct instruction with the children tailoring the delivery of that instruction to each child's personal learning repertoire. For a preschool setting these lessons only take 15-20 minutes per day leaving the child a great portion of the day for free-play. We do have three different group times, but they also only last 10-15 minutes. I believe instruction should be direct but in small daily doses. I agree with the child-centered people that children need much free-play time during the day. I just stay out of their free-play. I do not try to teach during their free-play time. I let them practice what they have learned on their own.
The Mixed-Age Benefit
In my daily schedule I alternate between group activities, free-play, and individual instruction. When I was bigger, I had to have many sessions during the day where I could do the children's one-on-one instruction. Those children that were not doing their one-on-one instruction had free-play at that time. Now that I am much smaller, I can usually finish the one-on-one instruction in one or two sessions in the morning. Even though I do not make them watch each other's school, it is hard to keep them from it. Many days they would rather watch me teach the other children than play. As a homeschooling mom, I understand the value of this. Children learn exponentially more watching an older child's lessons than you would think. They may not fully understand what is going on, but they pick up information you would think way beyond their ability. When they reach that point, they are already familiar with the concept and learn so much faster. This is one of the major benefits to the one-room schoolhouse concept that many homeschoolers employ in their settings. Dividing children by age is actually a relatively new educational concept in the grand scheme of things. For thousands of years, educators mixed ages to allow for this benefit. The younger learn from the older, and the older review watching the younger. It is like getting twice the educational bang for your buck.
One Size Does Not Fit All
As I have alluded to in previous paragraphs, some people would rather not teach if they had to follow such strict structure. Also, as I will cover in my next post, some children need more spontaneity than I provide in my setting. Not everyone has to set up their childcare like mine. Different children need different environments. When will we ever learn that one size will never fit all? Not every child fits in my environment. I tend to attract more conservative parents and parents of special needs children. In the early years, it is very important to find a setting for your child that matches your child's needs. As childcare providers, we need to understand this and not be offended if a child does not fit our setting. Trust me, trying to make a child fit into an environment that is completely opposite of their learning style can be torture for all involved.
Who Benefits from Structure?
What type of child normally fits well into a structured learning environment? I have already talked about children with special needs. This holds for nearly all children on the autism spectrum as well as children with developmental delays. Other children that benefit greatly from this environment are left-brain leaning children. They will thrive in this type of environment. Also, children with emotional issues such as excessive fear or anxiety will find comfort in an environment of this sort. On the other hand, right brain leaning children or children that thrive in a discovery-type environment will more than likely be miserable in a setting like this. The same holds for teachers. I am left-brain leaning and my mother is right-brain leaning. My environment sometimes drives her insane.
I hope you have enjoyed this post. Goodbye and God bless!! Check out Natalie's children's books at: https://www.amazon.com/author/nataliewade7457
What Is the Structured Learning Style?
Basically, it involves teacher-directed instruction. The instruction follows a predictable routine that varies little from day-to-day. In other words, the daily schedule is set and followed with only slight variations. The instruction follows a line by line format that allows the students to build precept on precept. Many would call this the most boring way to teach. However, for many children this type of system is comforting.
Structured Learning in a Childcare
What does structured learning look like in my childcare? Number one, I have a basic schedule that changes very little even from year to year. With family childcare a provider has the same children for multiple years not just one. When I initiate changes into my schedule, I will always do so gradually making small changes over the course of months until I reach the new goal. I have learned over the years that many small children have a very hard time with change. When they are allowed to settle into a routine, they will take great comfort in that "normalness" and fight all changes to their little world. Making change happen in very small increments helps them to accept the new "normal" over time. This is especially true of children with special needs and even children with ADD and ADHD even though that seems to be a paradox. You would think children with attention issues would hate structure and this type of schedule. However, even though they do hate it in the beginning, once they adjust, they will fight change more than any of the other children. Over the years it has amazed me how much this type of structure calms the most hyper of children. I will admit that some people find implementing this type of structure beyond what they can do. My mother absolutely hates having to implement change in small increments. It drives her nuts. She wants to institute the change and get on with it. I have also had many employees that were of the same mind. However, even my mother has now worked here long enough to understand that I am right, but she still hates it.
One-on-One Instruction
The second aspect of structured learning that I have implemented into my childcare revolves around the one-on-one instruction I provide every child every day. This is where my system deviates from public school classrooms and many other early childhood classrooms. I have a homeschool design to my childcare. Every child has individual planners that lay out his/her lessons in daily incremental steps. I use direct instruction with the children tailoring the delivery of that instruction to each child's personal learning repertoire. For a preschool setting these lessons only take 15-20 minutes per day leaving the child a great portion of the day for free-play. We do have three different group times, but they also only last 10-15 minutes. I believe instruction should be direct but in small daily doses. I agree with the child-centered people that children need much free-play time during the day. I just stay out of their free-play. I do not try to teach during their free-play time. I let them practice what they have learned on their own.
The Mixed-Age Benefit
In my daily schedule I alternate between group activities, free-play, and individual instruction. When I was bigger, I had to have many sessions during the day where I could do the children's one-on-one instruction. Those children that were not doing their one-on-one instruction had free-play at that time. Now that I am much smaller, I can usually finish the one-on-one instruction in one or two sessions in the morning. Even though I do not make them watch each other's school, it is hard to keep them from it. Many days they would rather watch me teach the other children than play. As a homeschooling mom, I understand the value of this. Children learn exponentially more watching an older child's lessons than you would think. They may not fully understand what is going on, but they pick up information you would think way beyond their ability. When they reach that point, they are already familiar with the concept and learn so much faster. This is one of the major benefits to the one-room schoolhouse concept that many homeschoolers employ in their settings. Dividing children by age is actually a relatively new educational concept in the grand scheme of things. For thousands of years, educators mixed ages to allow for this benefit. The younger learn from the older, and the older review watching the younger. It is like getting twice the educational bang for your buck.
One Size Does Not Fit All
As I have alluded to in previous paragraphs, some people would rather not teach if they had to follow such strict structure. Also, as I will cover in my next post, some children need more spontaneity than I provide in my setting. Not everyone has to set up their childcare like mine. Different children need different environments. When will we ever learn that one size will never fit all? Not every child fits in my environment. I tend to attract more conservative parents and parents of special needs children. In the early years, it is very important to find a setting for your child that matches your child's needs. As childcare providers, we need to understand this and not be offended if a child does not fit our setting. Trust me, trying to make a child fit into an environment that is completely opposite of their learning style can be torture for all involved.
Who Benefits from Structure?
What type of child normally fits well into a structured learning environment? I have already talked about children with special needs. This holds for nearly all children on the autism spectrum as well as children with developmental delays. Other children that benefit greatly from this environment are left-brain leaning children. They will thrive in this type of environment. Also, children with emotional issues such as excessive fear or anxiety will find comfort in an environment of this sort. On the other hand, right brain leaning children or children that thrive in a discovery-type environment will more than likely be miserable in a setting like this. The same holds for teachers. I am left-brain leaning and my mother is right-brain leaning. My environment sometimes drives her insane.
I hope you have enjoyed this post. Goodbye and God bless!! Check out Natalie's children's books at: https://www.amazon.com/author/nataliewade7457
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